Re: Compassion For Those Worried Whether They are Welcome
On Wed, Jan 02, 2019 at 07:45:55AM -0500, Sam Hartman wrote:
>>>>>> "Steve" == Steve McIntyre <steve@einval.com> writes:
>
> Steve> For those trying to undermine it with statements like "I'm
> Steve> worried I'll be thrown out of Debian if I make a single
> Steve> mistake", please give it a rest already. These are basic
> Steve> principles on how we want all people to interact. If you make
> Steve> a mistake and do a bad thing, people will tell you and ask
> Steve> you to re-word, apologise, whatever.
>
>Steve, I agree that the code of conduct is important.
>I agree that some comments sound like they are undermining it or trying
>to rehash old arguments.
>
>I think that's draining.
>
>However, I'd like to take a moment to ask all of us to empathize with a
>common position.
>We've seen two people who made significant technical contributions
>expelled from the project. If you weren't paying a lot of attention,
>there were no obvious public signs that a process was underway.
>
>Many members of our project have never had to interact with a concerned
>DAM team or the sharper parts of our conflict resolution process.
>
>It's easy to worry that something will spiral out of control and you
>will be ejected from a community that you've put a lot of your heart
>into over the years.
>As you say, we're all human and we all make mistakes.
>
>As humans it is natural to feel insecure when you see something like
>this happen.
>
>Asking for reassurance that we'll be treated with compassion and
>empathy, given a chance to understand what is going on and heard when
>we speak our part of the story is natural.
>THESE INSECURITIES AND ASKING FOR THAT REASSURANCE DOES NOT UNDERMINE
>THE CODE OF CONDUCT.
Nod. Apologies if my message sounds insensitive here! There are some
who I think might appear to be trying to undermine it, but I agree I'm
being unfair. Thanks for the correction.
>In this instance the insecurities are stronger because we're seeing
>people ejected and claiming that they were not given those chances and
>that they were surprised.
>
>To be clear, I am speaking from personal experience here. I think I've
>made positive contributions to the project, and I know people over the
>years have come to me when they had problems with what I did.
>If I think about it rationally, I have confidence that I'd be given a
>chance to learn and improve.
>And yet I looked at this and wondered if I'd someday find myself the
>subject of a surprise ejection.
>
>I was able to convince myself that my fear stems from how much I care
>about Debian. I do have confidence that even if there are trouble it
>can be worked through. For that matter, even if I found myself on the
>out, I could respectfully work to get back in and improve the process.
>
>Yet I firmly support the code of conduct and the importance of creating
>a safe space.
>
>I ask you to separate those who are trying to question the code of
>conduct from those who are seeking a very natural reassurance.
Agreed.
Happy New Year to you and yours!
--
Steve McIntyre, Cambridge, UK. steve@einval.com
"You can't barbecue lettuce!" -- Ellie Crane
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