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Re: new draft release announcement

On Mon, Apr 29, 2002 at 06:39:46PM -0400, Joey Hess wrote:
> Hamish Moffatt wrote:
> > "is upgraded" or "has been upgraded"? The tense is a little odd here.
> > 
> > Tense problem here too ("which is translated"). Better as either
> > "which is available in numerous languages" or "which has been translated
> > into numerous languages."
> > "have been added" (rather than "are added").
> I don't know why you're so fond of the passive tense. The release
> announcement is describing the changes that are present in the new
> release, so present tense is fine. 

Hmm, OK. It sounds weird to me. "is upgraded" - when? It sounds like
the announcement describes the upgrade process, rather than the work

Speaking of the passive voice, a grammar checker tool[1] picks you
up on: "Upgrades to Debian GNU/Linux 3.0 from earlier releases are
automatically handled by the apt package management tool." It suggests
"The apt package management tool automatically handles upgrades ..."

[1] "apt-cache search grammar" only finds compiler generators;
guess nobody has written or packaged a grammar checker yet.
So I used MS Word 2000 to check it. Sorry about that, only
tool I had on hand.

Hamish Moffatt VK3SB <hamish@debian.org> <hamish@cloud.net.au>

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