Re: [RFR] wml://{intro/diversity,News/2012/20120420}.wml (Was Bug#669011: Diversity statement for the Debian Project)

[Justin B Rye <jbr@edlug.org.uk>]

David Prévot wrote:
> In order not to focus too much about what people do
> (technical/non-technical stuff), and more about welcoming people, I
> propose to stick with Stefano second proposal:
> 
>  <q>This statement marks a new stage in the process of welcoming
> -contributors in our project</q> said Stefano Zacchiroli, who sees it as
> -a means to <q>be faithful to our vocation of universality</q>.
> +contributors in our project</q> said Stefano Zacchiroli, because
> +<q>community diversity goes hand in hand with community richness</q>.
> 
> Just committed in the repository, debian-l10n-english CC to fix the
> wording if needed.

Well, I see two minor issues.  I'll start with the second and simpler
one: putting "because" outside the quotes implies that the second
sentence is the reason he said that rather than the reason it's true.
Of course, he may not have literally had a "because" there in the
material we're quoting, but I'm hoping he'll let us pretend there was!
(Maybe it would be a smaller lie if we use "as".)

But the one that's really niggling at me is: where does "in our
project" fit in the first sentence?  Is it...

 a) This statement marks a new stage in the process of being welcoming
	in our project to contributors
 b) This statement marks a new stage in the process (in our project)
	of welcoming contributors
 c) This statement marks a new stage in the process of welcoming
	contributors-in-our-project
 d) This statement marks a new stage in the process of telling
	contributors "welcome to our project!"
 e) Further discussion

I think I think it's mostly (a), in which case I think I recommend the
following - it's still a bit ambiguous, but I'm hoping it's less
likely to make anybody else start worrying about that:

   <q>This statement marks a new stage in the process of welcoming
   contributors to our project</q> said Stefano Zacchiroli, <q>as
   community diversity goes hand in hand with community richness</q>.

Second opinions (especially diverse ones) welcomed...
-- 
JBR - and today's single word in West Greenlandic is:
                    Ilinniaqqikkiarturtinniqartussaq
            "One who should be sent to further his studies"