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Understanding voip and NAT

I would like to set up a system to communicate via voice from my Debian Linux 
PC on my local lan - via a NAT D-link 604 broadband router to the net, to my 
daughter running Windows XP  - behind a NAT wireless router (Linksys WRT54G) 
- which she shares with some friends at University.

It would also be nice, but not as essential, to also add my wife's Win98SE 
computer (also on the same LAN as my PC) into this communication system, with 
one on one, or conference calling.

I have a spare linux server on this network to run some form of server etc.

My local D-Link router has uPnP capability, and I can freely adjust which 
ports are forwarded to which IP address inside my LAN.  I "think" (but I am 
not 100% sure) that I get my daughter to adjust the routing of her NAT router 
if necessary.

I have been trying to read how to do this, but everything seems to assume that 
you already know all about what they are talking about.  Could someone who 
does understand it, give me some recommendations about what I should read 

I think that I probably need some form of SIP server (to enable both my sofe 
and myself to have independent addresses) which I can put on my debian server 
on the LAN side of my router.  Debian seems to have two possibilities 
(siproxyd and asterisk) for this, but I can't find anywhere that makes this 
100% clear, or tells me which one I really should use. (The biggest problem 
seems to be NAT traversal)

In terms of a client, I was thinking of using KPhone (since I already run KDE) 
on my Linux PC, and am looking around for something for the Windows machines.  
Xten seems a possibility - but then I got confused since it seems to only 
have a number dial interface and I couldn't see how that fitted with the 
Alan Chandler
First they ignore you, then they laugh at you,
 then they fight you, then you win. --Gandhi

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