[Date Prev][Date Next] [Thread Prev][Thread Next] [Date Index] [Thread Index]

Re: [etch-and-half] release notes review



On Wed, 2008-06-25 at 01:11 -0600, dann frazier wrote:
> On Tue, Jun 24, 2008 at 04:01:02PM +0200, Franklin PIAT wrote:
> > On Tue, 2008-06-24 at 05:25 -0600, dann frazier wrote:
> > > The etchnhalf team and the Frans Pop (on behalf of the d-i team) have
> > > drafted release notes for the etchnhalf portion of the upcoming 4.0r4
> > > release. We would appreciate any feedback you may have.
> > > 
> > >   http://people.debian.org/~dannf/tmp/etchnhalf/
> > 
> > * In the first paragraph, the reference to "2.6.24 etch-and-a-half
> >   kernel..."  seems a bit to come from nowhere. Is it supposed to
> >   be introduced in another page ?
> 
> This is introduced in the first paragraph "This includes packages
> based upon the Linux 2.6.24 kernel...", and then referred to in the
> 3rd. Do you have an alternate way of wording it that you believe would
> be more clear?


I made two attempts. The problem is that I change the semantic
from "etch-and-a-half is 4.0r4" to "etch-and-a-half is a set of
packages [to improve hardware support]". Even though it match my
understanding, it doesn't fits in the rest of the page (which should be
then worded as  install "Debian Etch 4.0r4 with etch-and-a-half")...

If we consider that etch-and-a-half = 4.0r4(+) as a whole, then we
should stick to your wording : Etch-and-a-half is the name of the
release, no need to explain it.

Franklin


** Attempt 1 **

current :
Additional packages have been added in the Debian 4.0r4 point release to
increase the set of hardware supported by Debian 4.0

proposed :
An additional set of packages, known as etch-and-a-half, have been added
in the Debian 4.0r4 point release to increase the set of hardware
supported by Debian 4.0


** Attempt 2 **

current :

This includes packages based upon the Linux 2.6.24 kernel and additional
drivers for the X window system.

proposed :

Those packages, collectively named "etch-and-a-half", includes Linux
2.6.24 kernels, modules for it and additional drivers for the X window
system.



Reply to: