Re: Debian backed by HP (pr preview 4)
> = Debian welcomes HP's support =
>
> As the first tier-one vendor, HP announced
> ( http://www.hp.com/hpinfo/newsroom/press/2006/060814a.html )
> that it has increased Linux distribution support options for
> customers and expanded its portfolio to include support
> for Debian GNU / Linux.
That reads almost identical to the HP release. Ripping off HP's
press release in your own press release could be a PR disaster and a
half. It would reinforce all the negative open source stereotypes as
well.
What does "As the first "tier-one vendor" mean? They were the first to
support debian? The first in the history of computing? It's unclear
and it probably also qualifies as jargon.
Maybe something more like:
With its announcement on Monday the 14th of August,
( http://www.hp.com/hpinfo/newsroom/press/2006/060814a.html ) HP became
the first tier one vendor (of what?) to support Debian GNU / Linux
I'm late to the party here and know you are on a tight time
schedule so I'll leave the rest alone, but for God's sakes change those
lines.
I'll subscribe to this list and see if I can help with this
kind of stuff more in the future. I didn't realize there was a place
for liberal arts students to be useful around here.
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