Re: [lack of] Public apology to Joseph Carter
[Anybody who wants to discuss this matter further with me can take it
up in private e-mail. I've wasted enough of the list's time as it
is.]
>>>>> Peter S Galbraith writes:
>> BTW, I find it somewhat laughable for you to righteously claim
>> that you didn't want to see what I wrote.
PSG> righteously claim?
Okay, that was uncalled for. My flippancy quota is filled up for this
month. I'll try to make sure this e-mail contains less flippant, and
more rational. ;)
PSG> Sure it is. It's possible to criticise _and_ be polite about it
PSG> at the same time.
I agree.
>> Such a filter also clearly states the heart of the issue: your
>> taking offense is *your* problem, not mine.
PSG> Wrong, this list (and other Debian lists) will only work if
PSG> people read them. Your posts discourage people from staying
PSG> subscribed.
When you `take offense' you take it from the person who gives it to
you. If you didn't take it, it would just fall flat on the floor,
like
PSG> Same for the Debian project as a whole. I will drop it like a
PSG> hot potato (no pun intended) as soon as too many people like you
PSG> cease to make it fun.
Awww... don't I make it *more* fun? ;)
I'm sure that the good stuff I've contributed more than makes up for
the occasional off-color e-mail. I usually find myself giggling and
bouncing off the walls with giddiness when I write mails.
Joseph's attitude completely floored me. He was rude to me, just
because I politely expressed a proposal that was similar to James and
Branden's, and James and Branden had flamed Joseph earlier. I was
tarred with the same brush, it made my blood boil, and *my* flame at
Joseph was trying to wake him from his stupor: IT IS NOT POLITE TO TAR
PEOPLE WITH THE SAME BRUSH; HERE'S WHAT IT FEELS LIKE, ASSHOLE.
If too many more people act how he acted towards me, then I will drop
Debian like a flaming slink.
Note that I'm not saying `if there are more _people like him_',
because I expect that Joseph will wise up, and watch his actions in
the future, since I believe him to be an intelligent human being.
Anyway, in response to all these flames, I've submitted a proposal
that I hope will make debian-policy debates more light and fun, and
less like directionless flamewars. People like Manoj and Havoc might
enjoy this, and I hope it gets accepted.
>> If you are a parent, and are being offended on behalf of your
>> children, I'd chastise you for not teaching them how to cope in
>> today's four-letter-word society.
PSG> As a parent, I won't accept anything you have to say about how I
PSG> raise my child.
That's fine... as a fellow parent, I'm only offering my advice as my
own opinion, not coersion.
Today I was just getting royally sick of being picked on. I'm sorry
if my reaction to you was excessively harsh.
Can you honestly blame me? Getting flamed by one person, and trying
to *consciously* express to them how much it hurt so they'd stop (not
to fall prey to my desire to unnecessarily hurt them), then being told
that I'm a bastard for the fact that I said `ouch! Fuck, that hurts!'
I still don't think I should have to apologize for what I first said
to Joseph (at least not until he apologizes to *me*, which he hasn't
done). Pick on him before you pick on me, and I'll be happy to
apologize for everything.
Here's a long list for people to choose from, if they feel I've
offended them in any way:
Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Dreadfully sorry. Pardon me. I meant no
offense. Sorry if I hurt you. Sorry. Sorry. I'm sorry.
The above apologies are all sincere, not sarcastic. I really am
sorry... I'm just sick of having to explain myself over and over and
over and over again. My best friends and I sometimes swear at each
other, because we're not expressing hatred, we're expressing hurt. We
know each other well enough not to take offense, and instead to figure
out what's hurting.
Too bad that some of you folks aren't mature enough to do the
same... yet. Maybe next year, you all will realize that I care deeply
about all of you: enough to dedicate my whole life to free software,
and that if I swear at you, it's because you did something that
*really* hurt me. It hurts because I care. Get over it, try not to
do it again, and let's get back into dialogue.
If you want to learn how not to be offended by me, just keep in mind
that *I care*, and I always assume that you do, too. If I think
you're acting like a stupid asshole, I'll tell you, so that you'll
stop.
So, Peter, I've said all this to try to explain why it is I thought
you were overly harsh in singling me out for criticism. Perhaps you
assumed that just because I was aware of what Joseph's doing, it meant
that I wasn't hurt and angry? Wrong. I am not a cold-blooded flamer;
I am a self-aware, passionate flamer.
Sheesh. Nuff said.
--
Gordon Matzigkeit <gord@fig.org> //\ I'm a FIG (http://www.fig.org/)
Committed to freedom and diversity \// I use GNU (http://www.gnu.org/)
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