Re: proposed changes to debian-faq
Beatrice Torracca wrote:
> I updated the Italian translation of the Debian FAQ. In doing so I
> notice a couple of minor things that I think can be changed (nothing
> substantial!).
>
> Since Holger is doing such an extensive great job in
> reorganizing/updating the FAQ I thought this might be a good moment to
> re-read the FAQs as a "low-level" reviewer. The changes I propose are
> mostly minor typos and such.
And almost all of them look to me like definite improvements in the
English. But:
> @@ -238,8 +238,8 @@
> <sect1 id="synaptic">synaptic
>
> <p><prgn/synaptic/ is a graphical package manager. It enables you to install,
> -upgrade and remove software packages in a user friendly way. Next to all
> -features offered by aptitude, it also has a feature for editing the list of
> +upgrade and remove software packages in a user friendly way. Next to
> +all the features offered by aptitude, it also has a feature for editing the list of
> used repositories, and supports browsing all available documentation related to
> a package. See the <url id="http://www.nongnu.org/synaptic/"; name="Synaptic
> Website"> for more information.
What is "next to" trying to say here? Something like "alongside",
"along with"? But more importantly, Synaptic doesn't in fact have
*all* the features offered by aptitude (like for instance the debtags
browser view). Could we change it to something like:
upgrade and remove software packages in a user friendly way. Along with
most of the features offered by aptitude, it also has a feature for editing the list of
[...]
> @@ -329,7 +329,7 @@
> command:
> <example>dpkg --status packagename</example>
>
> -<sect id="listfiles">How to display the files of a package installed?
> +<sect id="listfiles">How to display the files of an installed package?
This might just be intended as a sentence fragment talking about
how to do something, in which case it just needs to drop the question
mark, but comparing it with other section titles I suspect it's an
ungrammatical question and needs to turn into something along the
lines of "How do I display the files of an installed package?"
> @@ -372,13 +372,13 @@
> <p>If you install the <package>apt-file</package>, similar to the above, it
> searches files which contain the substring or regular expression
> <tt>foo</tt> in their full path names. The
> - advantage over the sample above is that there is no need to retrieve the
> + advantage over the exemple above is that there is no need to retrieve the
Oops, spelling: example
> @@ -387,7 +387,7 @@
> multimedia applications and
> dictionaries in Debian and has been introduced since some users might
> want to access the raw data without installing the program or because
> -the program can be run without the data itself, making it optional.
> +the program can be run without the data itself, making them optional.
No; "data" is "it", not "them", at least for English-speakers born
after about 1950. If you want to avoid the issue, you can say "making
the package optional".
> Index: uptodate.sgml
> ===================================================================
> --- uptodate.sgml (revisione 11195)
> +++ uptodate.sgml (copia locale)
> @@ -1,8 +1,8 @@
> -<!-- retain these comments for translator revision tracking -->
> +vn<!-- retain these comments for translator revision tracking -->
> <!-- Original version: $Revision: 1.24 $ -->
> <chapt id="uptodate">Keeping your Debian system up-to-date
Is that deliberate?
> -<p>A Debian goal is to provide a consistent upgrade path and a secure
> +<p>One of Debian goals is to provide a consistent upgrade path and a secure
No: One of Debian's goals
> +<!-- info on httpredir mostly from http://httpredir.debian.org/ -->
> +<p>Or you can use the redirector httpredir.debian.org which aims to
> + solve the problem of choosing a Debian mirror. It uses the geographic
> + location of the user and other information to choose the best mirror
> + that can serve the files. To take advantage of it use a source like
> + this one:
> +
> +<example>http://httpredir.debian.org/debian stable main contrib non-free</example>
> +
Looks good to me.
[...]
> <sect id="keepingalog">How can I keep a log of the packages I added to the
> - system? I'd like to know when which package upgrades and removals have
> - occured!
> + system? I'd like to know when upgrades and removals have
> + occured and on which packages!
^
Spelling:
occurred
--
JBR with qualifications in linguistics, experience as a Debian
sysadmin, and probably no clue about this particular package
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