Re: Things to check in release notes
Justin B Rye wrote:
> Now the big one. [...]
Here's the second half of the proofreading sweep for upgrading.dbk
(if fantasy movies are allowed two-part finales these days, so am I).
I hope I'm successfully keeping track of the sections that have been
"commented out".
I'm assuming that any time the text says "Squeeze/Wheezy" I should
just standardise it to "squeeze/wheezy", which seem to be the
renderings that &oldreleasename;/&releasename; substitute to.
I've made a couple of changes that verge on content-modifying:
process. For example, this will happen in desktop systems when
-<command>gdm</command> is restarted.
+the display manager is restarted.
(Since for a start gdm will be replaced during the upgrade.)
- As of 2012, Kolab is in a major rewrite and may get shipped with a
+ As of 2012, Kolab was in a major rewrite and may get shipped with a
(To show we do know what year it is.)
However, I haven't touched the somewhat cobbwebby references to
kernel-package and deborphan, which I raised concerns about even for
the Squeeze release.
Finally, at the top of the "list of obsolete packages":
<systemitem role="package">mysql-5.1</systemitem>, successor is
<systemitem role="package">mysql-5.5</systemitem>.
I don't see any mysql-5.* packages anywhere in Debian. Are those
source-package names? Should it say "mysql-server-5.x"?
--
JBR with qualifications in linguistics, experience as a Debian
sysadmin, and probably no clue about this particular package
Index: upgrading.dbk
===================================================================
--- upgrading.dbk (revision 9910)
+++ upgrading.dbk (working copy)
@@ -1001,8 +1001,8 @@
<section id="expected-removals">
<title>Expected removals</title>
<para>
-The upgrade process to &releasename; might ask for removal of
-packages in the system. The precise list of packages will vary depending on the
+The upgrade process to &releasename; might ask for the removal of
+packages on the system. The precise list of packages will vary depending on the
set of packages that you have installed. These release notes give general
advice on these removals, but if in doubt, it is recommended that you examine
the package removals proposed by each method before proceeding.
@@ -1120,15 +1120,16 @@
might find that at some points during the upgrade the console is shifted over
to a different view and you lose visibility of the upgrade
process. For example, this will happen in desktop systems when
-<command>gdm</command> is restarted.
+the display manager is restarted.
</para>
<para>
To recover the console where the upgrade was running you will have to use
<keycombo action='simul'><keycap>Ctrl</keycap><keycap>Alt</keycap><keycap>F1</keycap></keycombo>
-to switch back to the virtual terminal 1 if in the graphical startup screen or
-use <keycombo action='simul'><keycap>Alt</keycap><keycap>F1</keycap></keycombo>
-if in the local text-mode console. Replace F1 with the function key with the
-same number of the virtual terminal the upgrade was running in. You can also
+(if in the graphical startup screen) or
+<keycombo action='simul'><keycap>Alt</keycap><keycap>F1</keycap></keycombo>
+(if in the local text-mode console) to switch back to the virtual terminal 1.
+Replace F1 with the function key with the
+same number as the virtual terminal the upgrade was running in. You can also
use <keycombo action='simul'><keycap>Alt</keycap><keycap>Left Arrow</keycap></keycombo> or
<keycombo action='simul'><keycap>Alt</keycap><keycap>Right
Arrow</keycap></keycombo> to switch between the different text-mode terminals.
@@ -1177,7 +1178,7 @@
<section id="issues-screen">
<title>Screen</title>
<para>
-The GNU Screen versions in Squeeze and Wheezy don't use the same
+The GNU Screen versions in squeeze and wheezy don't use the same
communication protocol between the <command>screen</command> client
and the <command>SCREEN</command> server. Wheezy's <systemitem
role="package">screen</systemitem> package has been patched so that
@@ -1186,8 +1187,8 @@
</para>
<para>
The most prominent functionality which does not work properly when
-connecting to a Screen session started with Squeeze's version of
-<systemitem role="package">screen</systemitem> with Wheezy's version
+connecting to a Screen session started with squeeze's version of
+<systemitem role="package">screen</systemitem> with wheezy's version
of <systemitem role="package">screen</systemitem> as client is
terminal resizing (<literal>WINCH</literal> signal). The workaround is
to detach and reattach again to get the size of the terminals inside
@@ -1206,13 +1207,13 @@
bytes too small".
</para>
<para>
-All those issues vanish as soon as the Screen sessions started with
-Squeeze's version of <systemitem role="package">screen</systemitem>
-exited.
+All these issues vanish as soon as the Screen sessions started with
+squeeze's version of <systemitem role="package">screen</systemitem>
+are exited.
</para>
<para>
See also <filename>/usr/share/doc/screen/NEWS.Debian.gz</filename> of
-Wheezy's <systemitem role="package">screen</systemitem> package.
+wheezy's <systemitem role="package">screen</systemitem> package.
</para>
</section>
</section>
@@ -1281,8 +1282,8 @@
you can also use the kernel sources, provided in the <systemitem
role="package">linux-source</systemitem> package. You can make use of the
<literal>deb-pkg</literal> target available in the sources' makefile for
-building a binary package. There are some differences in these two approaches,
-please consult the respective package's documentation.
+building a binary package. There are some differences between these two approaches;
+please consult the documentation of the respective packages.
</para>
<para>
If possible, it is to your advantage to upgrade the kernel package separately
@@ -1921,10 +1922,10 @@
<para>
<systemitem role="package">postgresql-8.4</systemitem>, successor is
<systemitem role="package">postgresql-9.1</systemitem>.
- Wheezy provides solely an updated
+ Wheezy provides only an updated
<systemitem role="package">postgresql-plperl-8.4</systemitem> package
that is linked against the new version of libperl in order to enable
- upgrading to the new perl version in wheezy without making existing
+ upgrading to the new Perl version in wheezy without making existing
postgresql-8.4 installations unusable. Once the operating system
upgrade is finished, you should plan to also upgrade your PostgreSQL
8.4 database clusters to the new PostgreSQL version 9.1 using the
@@ -1979,14 +1980,14 @@
&releasename; and are obsolete. This includes
<systemitem role="package">xserver-xorg-video-nv</systemitem> and
<systemitem role="package">xserver-xorg-video-radeonhd</systemitem>.
- They might be removed through the upgrade. Users should install
+ They may be removed during the upgrade. Users should install
<systemitem role="package">xserver-xorg-video-all</systemitem>
instead.
</para>
</listitem>
<listitem>
<para>
- All Horde 3 packages, providing web collaborative softwares, have been
+ All Horde 3 packages, providing web collaborative software, have been
removed and are obsolete. This includes
<systemitem role="package">ansel1</systemitem>,
<systemitem role="package">chora2</systemitem>,
@@ -2019,7 +2020,7 @@
<systemitem role="package">libkolab-perl</systemitem>,
<systemitem role="package">php-kolab-filter</systemitem> and
<systemitem role="package">php-kolab-freebusy</systemitem>.
- As of 2012, Kolab is in a major rewrite and may get shipped with a
+ As of 2012, Kolab was in a major rewrite and may get shipped with a
later Debian release as the
<systemitem role="package">kolab</systemitem> package. NB: The SOGo
server (formerly named Scalable OpenGroupware.org) is shipped with
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