Re: Request for English debconf template review
On Mon, Jan 14, 2008 at 01:51:43AM +0000, Justin B Rye wrote:
> Steve Langasek wrote:
> > Template: slapd/slurpd_obsolete
> > Type: error
> > _Description: slurpd is obsolete; replicas must be reconfigured by hand
> > One or more slurpd "replica" options were found in your slapd config
> > when upgrading. Because slurpd is obsolete beginning with OpenLDAP
> > 2.4, you will need to migrate your replicas to use the syncrepl
> > protocol instead.
> > .
> > Since syncrepl is a pull-based protocol instead of a push-based one,
> > your configuration cannot be automatically converted for you and you
> > will need to configure your replica servers by hand. Please see
> > http://www.openldap.org/doc/admin24/syncrepl.html for details.
> I don't see any typos or serious stuff like that.
> Of course, if I look hard enough I'll find something to moan about.
> It does have a bit of an echo ("because foo, you will need to bar;
> since baz, you will need to quux"). How about this:
> During the upgrade, one or more slurpd "replica" options were found
> in the slapd configuration file. Beginning with OpenLDAP 2.4, slurpd
> is obsolete, so the replicas will need to be migrated to using
> syncrepl instead.
> .
> The conversion from the push-based slurpd protocol to the pull-based
> syncrepl protocol cannot be performed automatically. Please see
> http://www.openldap.org/doc/admin24/syncrepl.html for details of how
> to configure the replica servers by hand.
> (I've taken out all the "you"s, which may be going overboard.)
I think the first paragraph flows better in the original due to fewer
commas. I of course don't mind what you refer to as the echo (since I wrote
it that way), but if you think it still needs changing after the changes to
the second paragraph, I would be open to other improvements that don't make
the sentences choppy (or bend over backwards to avoid the second person).
The second paragraph does seem nicer, though I'm not totally happy with some
of the reorganization, and it's inexact to refer to slurpd as a protocol. I
would propose:
The conversion from slurpd to the pull-based syncrepl protocol cannot be
done automatically and you will need to configure your replica servers by
hand. Please see http://www.openldap.org/doc/admin24/syncrepl.html for
details.
On Mon, Jan 14, 2008 at 08:47:31AM +0000, MJ Ray wrote:
> Justin B Rye <jbr@edlug.org.uk> wrote: [...]
> > I don't see any typos or serious stuff like that.
>
> Me neither.
>
> > During the upgrade, one or more slurpd "replica" options were found
> > in the slapd configuration file. Beginning with OpenLDAP 2.4, slurpd
> > is obsolete, so the replicas will need to be migrated to using
> > syncrepl instead.
> I suggest avoiding the "Beginning with ..." construct and writing
> "slurpd became obsolete in OpenLDAP 2.4" instead because I think it's
> clearer and more direct.
I'm indifferent to the 'Beginning with' construction myself, but I am
strongly averse to beginning sentences with package names because these are
string literals and are therefore subject to conflicting capitalization
rules.
Thanks,
--
Steve Langasek Give me a lever long enough and a Free OS
Debian Developer to set it on, and I can move the world.
Ubuntu Developer http://www.debian.org/
slangasek@ubuntu.com vorlon@debian.org
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