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Bug#863881: release-notes: proofreading sweep - about.dbk


2017-06-01 21:44 GMT+08:00 Justin B Rye <justin.byam.rye@gmail.com>:
Package: release-notes
Severity: wishlist
Tags: patch

Just to get the ball rolling here's a commented diff on one of the
files that has least need for proofreading.  All I've got to suggest
are two very low-priority stylistic improvements.

 Index: about.dbk
 --- about.dbk  (revision 11524)
 +++ about.dbk  (working copy)
 @@ -51,7 +51,7 @@
  please file a bug in the <ulink url="" tracking
  system</ulink> against the <systemitem
  role="package">release-notes</systemitem> package. You
 -might want to review first the <ulink url="" bug
 +might first want to review the <ulink url="" bug
  reports</ulink> in case the issue you've found has already been reported. Feel
  free to add additional information to existing bug reports if you can
  contribute content for this document.

(This feels like a clumsy attempt to avoid a "split infinitive", but
in fact the way I'd naturally phrase it is like this, which avoids the
issue anyway.)

 @@ -132,7 +132,7 @@
      <emphasis>Debian Documentation Project</emphasis>.  You can use
      the <ulink url="">web interface</ulink> to
      access its files individually through the web and see their
 -    changes.  For more information on how to access the SVN please
 +    changes.  For more information on how to access SVN please
      consult the <ulink url="">Debian Documentation
      Project SVN information pages</ulink>.

I suppose developers may feel differently about this, but I wouldn't
naturally refer to a particular version control repository as "the"
SVN any more than I'd talk about checking something out of a git.

(The "Debian Documentation Project SVN information pages" also mention
git; is this SVN-only coverage in the release-notes still true or does
it need an update?)
JBR     with qualifications in linguistics, experience as a Debian
        sysadmin, and probably no clue about this particular package

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