Bug#900552: Bug #900552: Add privacy policy to the Debian website)
Hello
I have committed some minor changes to the privacy.wml document:
* Put the Debian Project definition in a separate paragraph to ease sync
with other docs and translations.
* make debian.net strong, and break lines to ease changes in wording and
translations
I'm submitting some comments and diffs to your consideration
01.- First paragraph, Debian Project definition
I suggest to use the same wording as we use in /intro/free, or the
wording in the "short" "About Debian" paragraph that we use in
announcements (e.g. /News/2018/20180310 ). I'm attaching a diff with the
former one.
02.- I'm attaching a diff with my suggestions for the section headers
03.- I find the wording of the paragraph about debian.net a bit
confusing because of the pronouns and repetition. I understand the
meaning (but I already know about debian.net), but I find difficult to
translate. I suggest to review:
<p>Please note that hosts and services under the
<strong>debian.net</strong>
domain are not part of the official Debian project;
they are run by individuals who have an association with the project rather
than the project themselves.
Questions about exactly what data those services hold should be directed
at the service owners rather than the Debian Project itself.</p>
I'm attaching a diff with my suggestion:
they are run by individuals who have an association with the project.
Questions about exactly what data those services hold should be directed
at the corresponding service owner rather than the Debian Project
itself.</p>
This is all for now, I'll try to review the content of each section and
post here my comments.
Thanks for all the work!
Kind regards,
--
Laura Arjona Reina
https://wiki.debian.org/LauraArjona
diff --git a/english/legal/privacy.wml b/english/legal/privacy.wml
index 6bc20e24009..640ce31a91b 100644
--- a/english/legal/privacy.wml
+++ b/english/legal/privacy.wml
@@ -1,8 +1,10 @@
#use wml::debian::template title="Privacy Policy" NOCOMMENTS="yes"
-<p>The <a href="https://www.debian.org/";>Debian Project</a> is a volunteer
-association of individuals who have made common cause to create a free
-operating system, referred to as Debian. </p>
+<p>The <a href="$(HOME)/">Debian Project</a> is an association of
+individuals who have made common cause to create a <a href="$(HOME)/intro/free">free</a>
+operating system. This operating system that we have created is called
+<strong>Debian</strong>.
+</p>
<p>There is no requirement for anyone who
wishes to use Debian to provide the project with any personal information; it
diff --git a/english/legal/privacy.wml b/english/legal/privacy.wml
index 40b8ad4548c..12b6a50fb24 100644
--- a/english/legal/privacy.wml
+++ b/english/legal/privacy.wml
@@ -31,7 +31,7 @@ than the project themselves.
Questions about exactly what data those services hold should be directed
at the service owners rather than the Debian Project itself.</p>
-<h2>Contributors (<a href="https://contributors.debian.org/";>contributors.debian.org</a>)</h2>
+<h2>The Contributors site (<a href="https://contributors.debian.org/";>contributors.debian.org</a>)</h2>
<p>The Debian Contributors site provides an aggregation of data about where
someone has contributed to the Debian Project, whether that's through filing a
@@ -52,7 +52,7 @@ software authors distributed source code, with Debian adding additional
information to track authorship and copyright to ensure that licenses are being
correctly documents and the Debian Free Software Guidelines adhered to.</p>
-<h2>Bug Tracking System (<a href="https://bugs.debian.org/";>bugs.debian.org</a>)</h2>
+<h2>The Bug Tracking System (<a href="https://bugs.debian.org/";>bugs.debian.org</a>)</h2>
<p>The bug tracking system is interacted with via email, and stores all emails
received in relation to a bug as part of that bug's history. In order that the
@@ -62,7 +62,7 @@ is available, the entirety of the bug tracking system is openly accessible.
Therefore any information, including names and email addresses as part of email
headers, sent to the BTS will be archived and publicly available.</p>
-<h2>DebConf (<a href="https://www.debconf.org/";>debconf.org</a>)</h2>
+<h2>The DebConf websites (<a href="https://www.debconf.org/";>debconf.org</a>)</h2>
<p>The DebConf registration structure stores the details of conference
attendees. These are required to determine eligibility to bursarys, association
@@ -71,7 +71,7 @@ also be shared with suppliers to the conference, e.g. attendees staying in the
conference provided accommodation will have their name and attendance date
shared with the accommodation provider.</p>
-<h2>Developers LDAP (<a href="https://db.debian.org";>db.debian.org</a>)</h2>
+<h2>The Developers LDAP (<a href="https://db.debian.org";>db.debian.org</a>)</h2>
<p>Project contributors (developers and others with guest accounts) who have
account access to machines within the Debian infrastructure have their details
@@ -84,7 +84,7 @@ location for project members to exchange such contact information. It is not
explicitly collected at any point and can always be removed by logging into the
db.debian.org web interface or sending signed email to the email interface.</p>
-<h2>Gitlab (<a href="https://salsa.debian.org/";>salsa.debian.org</a>)</h2>
+<h2>The Collaboration Management Platform (<a href="https://salsa.debian.org/";>salsa.debian.org</a>)</h2>
<p>salsa.debian.org provides an instance of the <a
href="https://about.gitlab.com/";>GitLab</a> DevOps lifecycle management tool.
@@ -103,7 +103,7 @@ these commit details once they are incorporated into the repository is
extremely disruptive and in some cases (such as when signed commits are in use)
impossible.</p>
-<h2>Gobby (<a href="https://gobby.debian.org/";>gobby.debian.org</a>)</h2>
+<h2>The Online Text Editor (<a href="https://gobby.debian.org/";>gobby.debian.org</a>)</h2>
<p>Gobby is a collaborative online text editor, which tracks contributions and
changes against connected users. No authentication is required to connect to
@@ -113,7 +113,7 @@ understand that it may prove possible to map usernames back to individuals
based upon common use of that username or the content they post to a
collaborative document within the system.</p>
-<h2>Mailing Lists (<a href="https://lists.debian.org/";>lists.debian.org</a>)</h2>
+<h2>The Mailing Lists (<a href="https://lists.debian.org/";>lists.debian.org</a>)</h2>
<p>Mailing lists are the primary communication mechanism of the Debian Project.
Almost all of the mailing lists related to the project are open, and thus
@@ -125,7 +125,7 @@ reasons for certain aspects of the project. Due to the nature of email these
archives will therefore potentially hold personal information, such as names
and email addresses.</p>
-<h2>New Members site (<a href="https://nm.debian.org/";>nm.debian.org</a>)</h2>
+<h2>The New Members site (<a href="https://nm.debian.org/";>nm.debian.org</a>)</h2>
<p>Contributors to the Debian Project who wish to formalise their involvement
may choose to apply to the New Members process. This allows them to gain the
@@ -143,7 +143,7 @@ outstanding applicants are publicly visible on the site, allowing anyone to see
the state of New Member processing within the Project to ensure an appropriate
level of transparency.</p>
-<h2>Popularity Contest (<a href="https://popcon.debian.org/";>popcon.debian.org</a>)</h2>
+<h2>The Popularity Contest (<a href="https://popcon.debian.org/";>popcon.debian.org</a>)</h2>
<p>"popcon" tracks which packages are installed on a Debian system, to enable
the gathering of statistics about which packages are widely used and which are
@@ -167,7 +167,7 @@ issues with the processing mechanisms. Anonymized submissions are kept for at
most 20 days. Summary reports, which contain no personally identifiable
information, are kept indefinitely.</p>
-<h2>snapshot (<a href="http://snapshot.debian.org/";>snapshot.debian.org</a>)</h2>
+<h2>The Snapshot Archive (<a href="http://snapshot.debian.org/";>snapshot.debian.org</a>)</h2>
<p>The snapshot archive provides a historical view of the Debian archive
(ftp.debian.org above), allowing access to old packages based on dates and
@@ -179,7 +179,7 @@ provides a useful resource to developers and users when tracking down
regressions in software packages, or providing a specific environment to run a
particular application.</p>
-<h2>Votes (<a href="https://vote.debian.org/";>vote.debian.org</a>)</h2>
+<h2>The Voting System (<a href="https://vote.debian.org/";>vote.debian.org</a>)</h2>
<p>The vote tracking system (devotee) tracks the status of ongoing General
Resolutions and the results of previous votes. In the majority of cases this
@@ -188,7 +188,7 @@ name mapping) and how they voted becomes publicly viewable. Only Project
members are valid voters for the purposes of devotee, and only valid votes are
tracked by the system.</p>
-<h2>Wiki (<a href="https://wiki.debian.org/";>wiki.debian.org</a>)</h2>
+<h2>The Wiki (<a href="https://wiki.debian.org/";>wiki.debian.org</a>)</h2>
<p>The Debian Wiki provides a support and documentation resource for the
Project which is editable by everyone. As part of that contributions are
@@ -205,7 +205,7 @@ address is required for the purposes of providing a mechanism for account
password reset, and notifying the user of any changes on pages they are
subscribed to.</p>
-<h2>Echelon</h2>
+<h2>The <q>Echelon</q> System</h2>
<p>Echelon is a system used by the Project to track member activity; in
particular it watches the mailing list and archive infrastructures, looking for
diff --git a/english/legal/privacy.wml b/english/legal/privacy.wml
index 40b8ad4548c..3306a1141c7 100644
--- a/english/legal/privacy.wml
+++ b/english/legal/privacy.wml
@@ -26,10 +26,9 @@ information used by those services and the reasons it is required.</p>
<p>Please note that hosts and services under the <strong>debian.net</strong>
domain are not part of the official Debian project;
-they are run by individuals who have an association with the project rather
-than the project themselves.
+they are run by individuals who have an association with the project.
Questions about exactly what data those services hold should be directed
-at the service owners rather than the Debian Project itself.</p>
+at the corresponding service owner rather than the Debian Project itself.</p>
<h2>Contributors (<a href="https://contributors.debian.org/";>contributors.debian.org</a>)</h2>
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