Hi,
On Tue, Aug 08, 2023 at 02:53:42PM +0200, Jean-Pierre Giraud wrote:
> I propose to add a short table of contents
+1
> Could you review and amend this draft is necessary?
In general, Evolution wraps long lines, which is unwelcome in case of
long links and code samples (sources.list). Another thing, consider
putting two blank lines before each header. Some other comments below;
looks great otherwise.
> Debian Project Bits posts will allow for a faster turnaround of some
> project news on a monthly basis. The Debian Micronews [1] service will
> continue to share shorter news items, the Debian Project News [2]
> remains as our official newsletter which may move to a biannual archive
> format. We hope that you enjoy this edition of the DPN.
Is it DPN or DPB at this point?
> The Debian Project was officially founded [3] by Ian Murdock on August
> 16, 1993. Since then we have celebrated our Anniversary of that date
> each year with events around the world. We would love it if you could
> join our revels this very special year as we have the honor of turning
> 30!
If manual line wrapping is possible, I wouldn't leave "30!" alone in its
own line.
> There will be a MiniDebConf [13] held in Cambridge, UK, hosted by ARM
s/ARM/Arm/
> During the last months, the Debian Community has organized some Bug
> Squashing Parties [14]:
>
> * Tilburg [15], Netherlands. October 2022
> * St-Cergue [16], Switzerland. January 2023 [...]
I would add some trailing semicolons.
> In January, Debian India hosted the MiniDebConf Tamil Nadu [18] in
> Viluppuram, Tamil Nadu, India (Sat 28 - Sun 26). The following month,
s/Sun 26/Sun 29/
> [...] we carry out some activities such as:
>
> * Gifts for attendees (stickers, cups, lanyards);
> * Workshop on how to contribute to the translation team; [...]
I would start these points with lowercase letters.
> 24: https://wiki.debian.org/DebianEvents/de/2023/DebianReunionHamburg
> 25:
> https://meetings-archive.debian.net/pub/debian-meetings/2023/Debian-Reunion-Hamburg/
Here "25:" is followed by a space character, unlike other in wrapped
links.
> The Brazilian translation team, debian-l10n-portuguese, had their first
> workshop of 2023 in February with great results. The workshop was aimed
> at beginners, working in DDTP/DDTSS [26]. For more information please
> see the <full report [27] written by the organizers.
s/the <full/the full/
> Releases
> --------
> Stable Release
Missing (IMHO) newline before the subheader.
> Bookworm's first point release 12.1 [35] address miscellaneous bug fixes
> affecting 88 packages, documentation, and installer updates was made
> available on July 22, 2023 [36].
s/address/adresses/
> The Debian 12 bookworm archive now includes non-free-firmware; please be
> sure to update your apt sources.list if your systems requires such
s/requires/require/
> apt sources.list
> The Debian archive holds several components:
Missing newline after the header.
> Example of the sources.list file
>
> deb http://deb.debian.org/debian bookworm main
> deb-src http://deb.debian.org/debian bookworm main
I would unindent the header ("Example (...)"), but indent the file
listing.
> For more information and guidelines on proper configuration of the apt
> source.list file please see the Configuring Apt Sources - Wiki page
> [44].
I would remove the dash, perhaps even put "Wiki page" before
"Configuring (...)".
> Please welcome the following newest Debian Project Members: Marius
> Gripsgard (mariogrip), Mohammed Bilal \(rmb), Emmanuel Arias \(amanu),
> Robin Gustafsson \(rgson), Lukas Märdian \(slyon), and David da Silva
> Polverari \(polverari).
Unnecessary Markdown backslashes.
> * trafficserver [46] Several vulnerabilities were discovered in Apache
> Traffic Server, a reverse and forward proxy server, which could result
> in information disclosure or denial of service.
Perhaps put a dash between the package name and the message? And, if
possible in Evolution, indent the wrapped lines.
> * asterisk [47] A flaw was found in Asterisk, an Open Source Private
> Branch Exchange. A buffer overflow vulnerability affects users that use
> PJSIP DNS resolver. This vulnerability is related to CVE-2022-24793. The
> difference is that this issue is in parsing the query record
> `parse_query()`, while the issue in CVE-2022-24793 is in `parse_rr()`. A
> workaround is to disable DNS resolution in PJSIP config (by setting
> `nameserver_count` to zero) or use an external resolver implementation
> instead.
I would remove Markdown's backticks.
> Once upon a time in Debian:
Make it a header perhaps?
> * 2009-08-05 Jeff Chimene files #540000 against live-initramfs. [64]
s/ / /
> This issue of Debian Project News was edited by The Publicity Team with
> contributions from Jean-Pierre Giraud, Joost van Baal-Ilić, Carlos
> Henrique Lima Melara, Donald Norwood, Paulo Henrique de Lima Santana
Missing trailing dot.
Thanks!
--
Grzegorz Szymaszek
Attachment:
signature.asc
Description: PGP signature