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Re: Press Anouncement preparation for Sarge r3



also sprach Joey Schulze <joey@infodrom.org> [2006.08.31.1535 +0200]:
> Here's the press release. Planned release: September 1st ~06:00 UTC.

Great! Here are my suggested editorial changes:

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> The Debian Project                                http://www.debian.org/
> Debian GNU/Linux 3.1 updated                            press@debian.org
> September 1st, 2006             http://www.debian.org/News/2006/20060901

s/1st/1/

Also, consider "1 September 2006" instead, which seems to be more,
uh, international. :)

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> 
> Debian GNU/Linux 3.1 updated
> 
> This is the third update of Debian GNU/Linux 3.1 (codename `sarge').

I would make the title "New revision of Debian GNU/Linux 3.1
released", because you are talking about "This" in the sentence, and
somehow there's no "this" introduced previously.

Or state something like "The Debian project released the third
revision ... . This is the third update ..."

> It mainly adds security updates to the stable release, along with a

s/mainly//

> few corrections to serious problems.  Those who frequently update from
> security.debian.org won't have to update many packages and most
> updates from security.debian.org are included in this update.
> 
> Please note that this update does not produce a new version of Debian

s/produce/constitute/

> GNU/Linux 3.1 but only adds a few updated packages to it.  There is no

s/adds a few updated packages to it/updates a few of its packages/

> need to throw away 3.1 CDs but only to update against ftp.debian.org

s/ but only/. Instead you need only/
s/against/from/

> after an installation, in order to incorporate those changes.  New CD
> and DVD images are being built right now and will be available soon
> at the regular locations.
> 
> Upgrading to this revision online is usually done by pointing the

s/online/on network-connected machines/

> `apt' package tool (see the sources.list(5) manual page) to one of
> Debian's many FTP or HTTP mirrors.  A comprehensive list of mirrors is
> available at:
> 
>     <http://www.debian.org/distrib/ftplist>

Note that the needed configuration is already in place on most
installations.

> Debian-Installer Update
> -----------------------
> 
> In order to add recent security updates for the Linux kernel to the

s/In order t/T/
s/updates for/updates to/

> installer and to reflect a binary interface change due to these

s/ and/, and/

> updates the Debian installer has been updated as well.  To accomplish

s/updates/updates,/

> this the following packages also required an update: base-config,
> base-installer, debian-installer, preseed.

I'd say "Therefore, the following packages were also updates:"

> Security Updates
> ----------------
> 
> This revision adds the following security updates to the stable release.
> The Security Team has already released an advisory for each of these
> updates. The security fixes of the kernel have been delayed to the next

A link to the DSA index page would be nice.

> point release due to constraints with the installer, please update the
> kernel images from security.debian.org.

Just earlier, you stated that security updates to the kernel
required a d-i rebuild. Maybe it would make sense to provide more
details why "security fixes of the kernel have been delayed" now.

> The current stable distribution:
> 
>   <ftp://ftp.debian.org/debian/dists/stable>

Any reason for ftp:// ? http:// also works and it's more
efficient...

> About Debian
> ------------
> 
> The Debian Project is an organisation of Free Software developers who

s/organisation of/organisation by/

Note that organisation is the British spelling (s instead of the US
z). Earlier, you said "September 1st", which is more US (albeit also
used in UK).

I welcome the British spelling and would rather see you replace the
date with the "international format".

> volunteer their time and effort in order to produce the completely

s/in order to/to/

> free operating systems Debian GNU/Linux.

s/free/Free/ ?

> Contact Information
> -------------------
> 
> For further information, please visit the Debian web pages at
> <http://www.debian.org/> or send mail to <press@debian.org> or

s/ or send/, send/
s/ or/, or/

> contact the stable release team at <debian-release@lists.debian.org>.


Thanks for your work, Joey (and others I presume).

-- 
Please do not send copies of list mail to me; I read the list!
 
 .''`.     martin f. krafft <madduck@debian.org>
: :'  :    proud Debian developer, author, administrator, and user
`. `'`     http://people.debian.org/~madduck http://debiansystem.info
  `-  Debian - when you have better things to do than fixing systems
 
if loving linux is wrong, i don't want to be right.

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