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Re: Bug#895348: gnome-panel: Description has been misleading since GNOME 3

Simon McVittie wrote:
> gnome-panel's Description currently says:

I don't know much about GNOME of any vintage, but I can offer some
suggestions for reduced wordage:

>     GNOME Flashback is a continuation of the GNOME 2 desktop user
>     interface, providing a more traditional design than GNOME 3. It is
>     suitable for older or more limited hardware where GNOME 3 might
>     have low performance.
>     .
>     The GNOME Panel is an essential part of GNOME Flashback, providing
>     toolbar-like “panels” which can [etc.] system monitoring.
>     .
>     The GNOME Panel was part of the GNOME Desktop before version 3.
>     Its equivalent in the GNOME 3 desktop environment is part of the
>     GNOME Shell, so the GNOME Panel is no longer required on GNOME 3
>     systems.

The one part where I've got any doubts about the English is in the
part covered by your "[etc.]":

    notification area, volume controls and the battery charge indicator,
    and utilities ranging from weather forecast to system monitoring.
    ^^^                                       ^                  ^^^ 
Ands and ands and ands, plus oddly phrased "forecast" alongside
"monitoring".  Maybe if they were "forecasts" and "monitors"...

But most of my changes are just attempts to squeeze it into fewer

      GNOME Flashback continues the traditional desktop user interface
      of GNOME 2, for hardware that would struggle with GNOME 3.
      The GNOME Panel (replaced in GNOME 3 by the GNOME Shell) is an
      essential part of GNOME Flashback, providing the desktop with
      attachable sidebars. They are used to launch applications and embed
      various other functions, such as quick launch icons, the clock, the
      notification area, volume controls and the battery charge indicator,
      plus utilities ranging from weather forecasts to system monitors.

Then again, are the "quick launch icons" separate from the mechanism
for launching applications, or is this repetition?  Is there a
significant distinction between "functions" like the battery monitor
and "utilities" like the system monitor?  Perhaps it should be
something like:

      attachable sidebars. They provide quick launch icons for applications,
      and can embed various other functions, such as the notification area,
      volume controls, the clock, and displays for the weather, battery life,
      and other system monitors.

(Or should it mention wifi?)
JBR	with qualifications in linguistics, experience as a Debian
	sysadmin, and probably no clue about this particular package

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