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Re: [RFR] templates://uptimed/{uprecords-cgi.templates,uptimed.templates}



Christian PERRIER wrote:
> Your review should be sent as an answer to this mail.
[...]
>  Template: uptimed/interval

All looks good...

>  Template: uptimed/maxrecords
>  Type: string
>  Default: 50
>  _Description: Number of records that should be kept:
> + On systems that reboot frequently, you will get a
>   fairly large list of uptime records pretty soon. To avoid this, uptimed
>   will only keep the n highest uptimes. You may want to limit this to a
>   lower value if you want to get emails each time a record is broken or
> + reboot your machine often.
> 
> drop "such as desktop PCs". Most don't reboot that often and there are
> numerous other examples anyway.

Indeed - uptimed says 99 days 22 hours!

I think I would put back a couple of elided words to make it easier to
avoid misparsing "you may want X if you want Y or Z":

    if you reboot your machine often.

[...]
>  _Description: Send mails if a milestone or record is reached:
>   Uptimed can be configured to send a mail each time a record is broken or a
> + "milestone" is reached. You can choose whether you:
>   .
> +  - never want to receive these mails;
> +  - want to be notified only when a record is broken;
> +  - would like to know about milestones;
> +  - are interested in both.
> 
> Standardize the enumeration...

Also switch to asterisks.

>  Template: uptimed/mail/address
>  Type: string
>  Default: root
>  _Description: Uptimed emails recipient:

Piles of attributive nouns normally drop plural endings.

   _Description: Uptimed email recipient:

>   Since you have chosen to be sent emails, you should specify where to send
> + these mails.
> 
> Simplfy things. Why need to explain why "root makes sense but also may
> not make sense"....
> 
>  
>  Template: uptimed/mail/milestones_info
>  Type: note
> +_Description: Milestone configuration must be done manually
> + The milestones must
>   be configured manually in /etc/uptimed.conf. Since you have chosen to
> + receive emails for milestones you may probably want to modify that file.
                                      ^^^
Drop the "may".
 
> This note is debconf abuse (se debconf-devel(7) to learn why). If you
> really insist on keeping it, here is a proposed rewrite.

Well, if it only pops up when the admin is already interacting with
debconf then at least it's not like the ones that pointlessly stall
the install while I'm off on my tea break.
 
> --- uptimed.old/debian/control	2012-05-28 12:53:55.654480933 +0200
> +++ uptimed/debian/control	2012-05-28 13:14:36.951790453 +0200
> @@ -10,14 +10,14 @@
>  Architecture: any
>  Pre-Depends: ${misc:Pre-Depends}
>  Depends: ${misc:Depends}, ${shlibs:Depends}, lsb-base
> +Description :utility to track highest uptimes - daemon

Oops, descended colon.

Just dropping the "your" doesn't quite work, but maybe we can say:

   Description: utility to track high uptimes - daemon

> + Uptimed allows tracking highest uptimes via boot IDs.

This time keep the "highest" and fix it up the other way (incidentally
featuring a Why The Name hint for anybody who still needs one and
eliminating a useless "allows"):

    The uptime daemon tracks a system's highest uptimes via boot IDs.

>   It uses the system boot time to keep sessions apart from each
>   other.
>   .
>   Features:
> +  - Console program to display statistics;
> +  - Can send mail if a milestone or a new record is reached.

Again, asterisks.  Or, following my usual rule of thumb that asterisks
are only worth having in sets of three or more, just write it as a
sentence.  Rephrasing to fit:

   Description: utility to track high uptimes - daemon
    The uptime daemon tracks a system's highest uptimes via boot IDs,
    using the system boot time to keep sessions apart from each other.
    It features a console program to display statistics, and can
    send mail if a milestone or a new record is reached.

> Avoid personnalization. These are not "my" highest uptimes.

Indeed, I rarely get past the twenty hour mark myself.
 
>  Package: libuptimed0
[...]
>  Description: utility to track highest uptimes - library
[...]       
> + This package provides the library package for uptimed.
>  
>  Package: libuptimed-dev
[...]
> +Description: utility to track highest uptimes - development files
[...]
>  This is the development files package for uptimed
                                                    ^
No new changes... oh, wait, final punctuation there.

>  Package: uprecords-cgi
[...]
> Recommends: apache | httpd

Cobwebby...

> +Description: utility to track highest uptimes - CGI script
[...]
> + This package provides a CGI script that produces an HTML report containing all
> + highest uptimes from the uptimed database.
   ^
Insert "the".

Meanwhile, you didn't mention uprecords-cgi.template, but there are a
few changes I'd make:

> Template: uprecords-cgi/layout
> Type: select
> __Choices: pre, list, table
> Default: pre
> _Description: Format used by uprecords.cgi:
>  The uprecords CGI script has different ways of doing a proper display
>  layout. Which method you want to use depends mainly on your personal
>  preference. Available options are:

Well, obviously what you want depends on your preferences.  Maybe:

   Three different layouts are available for use by the uprecords CGI script.
   Which method you use is a matter of personal preference.
>  .
>   - pre: Encloses everything in <pre>...</pre>
>   - list: Makes a list, using <ol>...</ol>
>   - table: Creates an HTML table.

s/ - / * /g
 
> Template: uprecords-cgi/maxentries
> Type: string
> Default: 10
> _Description: Number of records showed by uprecords.cgi:
                                  shown
[...]
> Template: uprecords-cgi/install_note
> Type: note
> _Description: uprecords.cgi has been installed into the webtree

I'm not keen on "webtree", but I'll just add a space and settle for
that.  Likewise "web( )server" throughout.

[...]
>  In the default webserver configuration, CGI scripts are accessible from
>  anywhere in the world. If you do not want this, you should set up access
>  restrictions (but who doesn't want to show off with his/her uptimes?).

Clunky hesheism and painful "?)."; just stick to second person with

   restrictions... but why wouldn't you want to show off your uptimes?

(Or maybe this is just annoying teabreak-spoiling debconf note abuse
and should go completely.)

>  .
>  You may also want to modify the HTML header and footer files in
>  /etc/uprecords-cgi or tell your webmaster to do so (remember to give him
>  the necessary permissions then).

Oh, so I might be female but the webmaster's definitely male, huh?

   /etc/uprecords-cgi (or have your webmaster do so).

-- 
JBR	with qualifications in linguistics, experience as a Debian
	sysadmin, and probably no clue about this particular package
diff -ru old/control new/control
--- old/control	2012-05-28 12:49:55.083392599 +0100
+++ new/control	2012-05-28 16:16:09.283393057 +0100
@@ -10,14 +10,11 @@
 Architecture: any
 Pre-Depends: ${misc:Pre-Depends}
 Depends: ${misc:Depends}, ${shlibs:Depends}, lsb-base
-Description: Utility to track your highest uptimes
- Uptimed allows you to track your highest uptimes via boot IDs.
- It uses the system boot time to keep sessions apart from each
- other.
- .
- Features:
-  - Console program to display statistics
-  - Can send mail if a milestone or a new record is reached
+Description: utility to track high uptimes - daemon
+ The uptime daemon tracks a system's highest uptimes via boot IDs,
+ using the system boot time to keep sessions apart from each other.
+ It features a console program to display statistics, and can
+ send mail if a milestone or a new record is reached.
 
 Package: libuptimed0
 Section: libs
@@ -25,37 +22,36 @@
 Depends: ${shlibs:Depends}, ${misc:Depends}, perl
 Conflicts: libuptimed
 Replaces: libuptimed
-Description: Library for uptimed
- Uptimed allows you to track your highest uptimes via boot IDs.
- .
- Features:
-  - Console program to display statistics
-  - Can send mail if a milestone or a new record is reached
+Description: utility to track high uptimes - library
+ The uptime daemon tracks a system's highest uptimes via boot IDs,
+ using the system boot time to keep sessions apart from each other.
+ It features a console program to display statistics, and can
+ send mail if a milestone or a new record is reached.
  .
- This is the library package for uptimed
+ This package provides the library package for uptimed.
 
 Package: libuptimed-dev
 Section: libdevel
 Architecture: any
 Depends: ${shlibs:Depends}, ${misc:Depends}, perl, libuptimed0 (= ${binary:Version})
 Replaces: libuptimed
-Description: Development files for uptimed
- Uptimed allows you to track your highest uptimes via boot IDs.
- .
- Features:
-  - Console program to display statistics
-  - Can send mail if a milestone or a new record is reached
+Description: utility to track high uptimes - development files
+ The uptime daemon tracks a system's highest uptimes via boot IDs,
+ using the system boot time to keep sessions apart from each other.
+ It features a console program to display statistics, and can
+ send mail if a milestone or a new record is reached.
  .
- This is the development files package for uptimed
+ This is the development files package for uptimed.
 
 Package: uprecords-cgi
 Architecture: all
 Depends: uptimed (>= ${source:Version}), ${misc:Depends},
 Recommends: apache | httpd
-Description: CGI script to show the world your highest uptimes
- This CGI script produces a HTML report containing all your
- highest uptimes from the uptimed database.
+Description: utility to track high uptimes - CGI script
+ The uptime daemon tracks a system's highest uptimes via boot IDs,
+ using the system boot time to keep sessions apart from each other.
+ It features a console program to display statistics, and can
+ send mail if a milestone or a new record is reached.
  .
- Uptimed is a tool that allows you to track your highest uptimes
- via boot IDs. It uses the system boot time to keep sessions
- apart from each other.
+ This package provides a CGI script that produces an HTML report
+ containing all the highest uptimes from the uptimed database.
diff -ru old/uprecords-cgi.templates new/uprecords-cgi.templates
--- old/uprecords-cgi.templates	2012-05-28 12:49:52.319392331 +0100
+++ new/uprecords-cgi.templates	2012-05-28 16:07:41.115392454 +0100
@@ -3,34 +3,32 @@
 __Choices: pre, list, table
 Default: pre
 _Description: Format used by uprecords.cgi:
- The uprecords CGI script has different ways of doing a proper display
- layout. Which method you want to use depends mainly on your personal
- preference. Available options are:
+ Three different layouts are available for use by the uprecords CGI script.
+ Which method you use is a matter of personal preference.
  .
-  - pre: Encloses everything in <pre>...</pre>
-  - list: Makes a list, using <ol>...</ol>
-  - table: Creates an HTML table.
+  * pre: Encloses everything in <pre>...</pre>
+  * list: Makes a list, using <ol>...</ol>
+  * table: Creates an HTML table.
 
 Template: uprecords-cgi/maxentries
 Type: string
 Default: 10
-_Description: Number of records showed by uprecords.cgi:
+_Description: Number of records shown by uprecords.cgi:
  While uptimed may keep a large number of uptime records, not all of them
  are interesting to the outside world. Thus, you can limit the number of
  records that will be shown here.
 
 Template: uprecords-cgi/install_note
 Type: note
-_Description: uprecords.cgi has been installed into the webtree
+_Description: uprecords.cgi has been installed into the web tree
  You have installed the uprecords-cgi package. That means that a new CGI
  script has been installed, which is now visible to the outside world as
  http://${hostname}/cgi-bin/uprecords.cgi (if you didn't modify your
- webserver configuration to have CGI scripts in a different place).
+ web server configuration to have CGI scripts in a different place).
  .
- In the default webserver configuration, CGI scripts are accessible from
+ In the default web server configuration, CGI scripts are accessible from
  anywhere in the world. If you do not want this, you should set up access
- restrictions (but who doesn't want to show off with his/her uptimes?).
+ restrictions... but why wouldn't you want to show off your uptimes?
  .
  You may also want to modify the HTML header and footer files in
- /etc/uprecords-cgi or tell your webmaster to do so (remember to give him
- the necessary permissions then).
+ /etc/uprecords-cgi (or have your webmaster do so).
diff -ru old/uptimed.templates new/uptimed.templates
--- old/uptimed.templates	2012-05-28 12:49:53.855392525 +0100
+++ new/uptimed.templates	2012-05-28 15:27:28.891393053 +0100
@@ -1,21 +1,21 @@
 Template: uptimed/interval
 Type: string
 Default: 600
-_Description: Seconds that should pass between database updates:
- Uptimed will update its database every n seconds so that the uptime
+_Description: Delay between database updates (seconds):
+ Uptimed will update its database regularly so that the uptime
  doesn't get lost in case of a system crash. You can set how frequently
  this will happen (use higher values if you want to avoid disk activity,
- for example on a laptop). 60 seconds should be a reasonable default.
+ for instance on a laptop).
 
 Template: uptimed/maxrecords
 Type: string
 Default: 50
 _Description: Number of records that should be kept:
- On systems that reboot frequently (such as desktop PCs), you will get a
+ On systems that reboot frequently, you will get a
  fairly large list of uptime records pretty soon. To avoid this, uptimed
  will only keep the n highest uptimes. You may want to limit this to a
  lower value if you want to get emails each time a record is broken or
- reboot your machine often. 10 is a nice value.
+ if you reboot your machine often.
 
 Template: uptimed/mail/do_mail
 Type: select
@@ -23,25 +23,23 @@
 Default: Never
 _Description: Send mails if a milestone or record is reached:
  Uptimed can be configured to send a mail each time a record is broken or a
- "milestone" is reached. You can choose whether you
+ "milestone" is reached. You can choose whether you:
  .
-  - never want to receive these mails
-  - want to be notified only when a record is broken
-  - would like to know about milestones
-  - are interested in both
+  * never want to receive these mails;
+  * want to be notified only when a record is broken;
+  * would like to know about milestones;
+  * are interested in both.
 
 Template: uptimed/mail/address
 Type: string
 Default: root
-_Description: Uptimed emails recipient:
+_Description: Uptimed email recipient:
  Since you have chosen to be sent emails, you should specify where to send
- these mails. The default "root@localhost" makes sort of sense, but if you
- are one of many sysadmins and you are unsure whether the other admins want
- to get these mails, you should probably set this to your real address.
+ these mails.
 
 Template: uptimed/mail/milestones_info
 Type: note
-_Description: Milestone configuration should be done manually
- While all other configuration options can be set here, the milestones must
+_Description: Milestone configuration must be done manually
+ The milestones must
  be configured manually in /etc/uptimed.conf. Since you have chosen to
- receive emails for milestones you may probably want to edit that file.
+ receive emails for milestones you probably want to modify that file.
Source: uptimed
Section: utils
Priority: extra
Maintainer: Thibaut VARENE <varenet@debian.org>
Build-Depends: debhelper (>= 8.1.0~), dpkg-dev (>> 1.16.1~), automake, libtool, po-debconf
Standards-Version: 3.9.3
Homepage: http://podgorny.cz/uptimed

Package: uptimed
Architecture: any
Pre-Depends: ${misc:Pre-Depends}
Depends: ${misc:Depends}, ${shlibs:Depends}, lsb-base
Description: utility to track high uptimes - daemon
 The uptime daemon tracks a system's highest uptimes via boot IDs,
 using the system boot time to keep sessions apart from each other.
 It features a console program to display statistics, and can
 send mail if a milestone or a new record is reached.

Package: libuptimed0
Section: libs
Architecture: any
Depends: ${shlibs:Depends}, ${misc:Depends}, perl
Conflicts: libuptimed
Replaces: libuptimed
Description: utility to track high uptimes - library
 The uptime daemon tracks a system's highest uptimes via boot IDs,
 using the system boot time to keep sessions apart from each other.
 It features a console program to display statistics, and can
 send mail if a milestone or a new record is reached.
 .
 This package provides the library package for uptimed.

Package: libuptimed-dev
Section: libdevel
Architecture: any
Depends: ${shlibs:Depends}, ${misc:Depends}, perl, libuptimed0 (= ${binary:Version})
Replaces: libuptimed
Description: utility to track high uptimes - development files
 The uptime daemon tracks a system's highest uptimes via boot IDs,
 using the system boot time to keep sessions apart from each other.
 It features a console program to display statistics, and can
 send mail if a milestone or a new record is reached.
 .
 This is the development files package for uptimed.

Package: uprecords-cgi
Architecture: all
Depends: uptimed (>= ${source:Version}), ${misc:Depends},
Recommends: apache | httpd
Description: utility to track high uptimes - CGI script
 The uptime daemon tracks a system's highest uptimes via boot IDs,
 using the system boot time to keep sessions apart from each other.
 It features a console program to display statistics, and can
 send mail if a milestone or a new record is reached.
 .
 This package provides a CGI script that produces an HTML report
 containing all the highest uptimes from the uptimed database.
Template: uprecords-cgi/layout
Type: select
__Choices: pre, list, table
Default: pre
_Description: Format used by uprecords.cgi:
 Three different layouts are available for use by the uprecords CGI script.
 Which method you use is a matter of personal preference.
 .
  * pre: Encloses everything in <pre>...</pre>
  * list: Makes a list, using <ol>...</ol>
  * table: Creates an HTML table.

Template: uprecords-cgi/maxentries
Type: string
Default: 10
_Description: Number of records shown by uprecords.cgi:
 While uptimed may keep a large number of uptime records, not all of them
 are interesting to the outside world. Thus, you can limit the number of
 records that will be shown here.

Template: uprecords-cgi/install_note
Type: note
_Description: uprecords.cgi has been installed into the web tree
 You have installed the uprecords-cgi package. That means that a new CGI
 script has been installed, which is now visible to the outside world as
 http://${hostname}/cgi-bin/uprecords.cgi (if you didn't modify your
 web server configuration to have CGI scripts in a different place).
 .
 In the default web server configuration, CGI scripts are accessible from
 anywhere in the world. If you do not want this, you should set up access
 restrictions... but why wouldn't you want to show off your uptimes?
 .
 You may also want to modify the HTML header and footer files in
 /etc/uprecords-cgi (or have your webmaster do so).
Template: uptimed/interval
Type: string
Default: 600
_Description: Delay between database updates (seconds):
 Uptimed will update its database regularly so that the uptime
 doesn't get lost in case of a system crash. You can set how frequently
 this will happen (use higher values if you want to avoid disk activity,
 for instance on a laptop).

Template: uptimed/maxrecords
Type: string
Default: 50
_Description: Number of records that should be kept:
 On systems that reboot frequently, you will get a
 fairly large list of uptime records pretty soon. To avoid this, uptimed
 will only keep the n highest uptimes. You may want to limit this to a
 lower value if you want to get emails each time a record is broken or
 if you reboot your machine often.

Template: uptimed/mail/do_mail
Type: select
__Choices: Never, Record, Milestone, Both
Default: Never
_Description: Send mails if a milestone or record is reached:
 Uptimed can be configured to send a mail each time a record is broken or a
 "milestone" is reached. You can choose whether you:
 .
  * never want to receive these mails;
  * want to be notified only when a record is broken;
  * would like to know about milestones;
  * are interested in both.

Template: uptimed/mail/address
Type: string
Default: root
_Description: Uptimed email recipient:
 Since you have chosen to be sent emails, you should specify where to send
 these mails.

Template: uptimed/mail/milestones_info
Type: note
_Description: Milestone configuration must be done manually
 The milestones must
 be configured manually in /etc/uptimed.conf. Since you have chosen to
 receive emails for milestones you probably want to modify that file.

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