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Re: Request for review [updates templates]



Michael Hanke wrote:
> I have incorporated all suggested changes. I'm attaching the updated
> templates, as well as a diff of all changes done on top of the
> templates update that Justin sent.
> 
> The only remaining issue seems to be the confusion regarding the 'UID domain'.
> I'd be glad to get suggestions on how to rewrite this template.

I'm hoping to do another pass on the templates later today, but
meanwhile looking at the control file Christian posted I see that
the package descriptions could do with a couple of tweaks, too.

 * "workload management system" isn't the best description for Condor.
	In fact it never quite says that there's anything networky
	about this software.  Throw in the word "distributed"?
 * there's also one typo:
  Unlike more traditional batch queueing system,
                                               ^s
 * the final paragraph of the PD for condor is a bit awkward, with the
	same odd use of "shall";
 * the descriptions for libclassad3(-dev) are technical details of the
	implementation, rather than explanations of what the library
	is good for.  I'd suggest using different bits of the upstream
	blurb - something like
  Classified Advertisements (classads) are the lingua franca of Condor, used for
  describing jobs, workstations, and other resources. There is a protocol for
  evaluating whether two classads match, which is is used by the Condor central
  manager to determine the compatibility of jobs, and workstations where they
  may be run.
	(though maybe I'm moving too far from the implementation
	details here)

Okay, so apparently I've ended up already coming up with a patch;
attached.

I usually throw in a "WhyTheName?" whine around about here, but
"Condor" strikes me as too obvious to need one.  It's got something to
do with clouds, and scavenging CPU cycles, and operating on a high
level, and it hasn't been used on an O'Reilly cover yet.
-- 
JBR	with qualifications in linguistics, experience as a Debian
	sysadmin, and probably no clue about this particular package
--- condor-7.7.6~dfsg.1.pristine/debian/control	2012-04-24 19:10:03.000000000 +0100
+++ condor-7.7.6~dfsg.1/debian/control	2012-04-26 23:54:15.987392594 +0100
@@ -25,44 +25,43 @@
  libcgroup1 (>=0.37~)
 Recommends: dmtcp
 Suggests: coop-computing-tools
-Description: workload management system
+Description: distributed workload management system
  Like other full-featured batch systems, Condor provides a job queueing
  mechanism, scheduling policy, priority scheme, resource monitoring, and
- resource management. Users submit their serial or parallel jobs to Condor,
+ resource management. Users submit their serial or parallel jobs to Condor;
  Condor places them into a queue. It chooses when and where to run the jobs
  based upon a policy, carefully monitors their progress, and ultimately
  informs the user upon completion.
  .
- Unlike more traditional batch queueing system, Condor can also effectively
+ Unlike more traditional batch queueing systems, Condor can also effectively
  harness wasted CPU power from otherwise idle desktop workstations. Condor
  does not require a shared file system across machines - if no shared file
  system is available, Condor can transfer the job's data files on behalf of
  the user.
  .
- The Debian package uses Debconf to determine an appropriate initial
- configuration for a machine that shall join an existing Condor pool, and
- moreover, allows creating a "Personal" (single machine) Condor pool
- automatically.
+ This package can set up an appropriate initial configuration at install
+ time for a machine intended either as a member of an existing Condor pool
+ or as a "personal" (single machine) Condor pool.
 
 
 #Package: condor-tests
 #Architecture: any
 #Depends: ${misc:Depends}, ${shlibs:Depends}
-#Description: test suite for Condor
+#Description: distributed workload management system - test suite
 # Like other full-featured batch systems, Condor provides a job queueing
 # mechanism, scheduling policy, priority scheme, resource monitoring, and
-# resource management. Users submit their serial or parallel jobs to Condor,
+# resource management. Users submit their serial or parallel jobs to Condor;
 # Condor places them into a queue. It chooses when and where to run the jobs
 # based upon a policy, carefully monitors their progress, and ultimately
 # informs the user upon completion.
 # .
-# Unlike more traditional batch queueing system, Condor can also effectively
+# Unlike more traditional batch queueing systems, Condor can also effectively
 # harness wasted CPU power from otherwise idle desktop workstations. Condor
 # does not require a shared file system across machines - if no shared file
 # system is available, Condor can transfer the job's data files on behalf of
 # the user.
 # .
-# This package provides Condor's test-suite that can be used to verify
+# This package provides Condor's test-suite, which can be used to verify
 # proper functioning of a Condor installation.
 
 
@@ -70,15 +69,15 @@
 Section: devel
 Architecture: any
 Depends: ${misc:Depends}, ${shlibs:Depends}
-Description: development files for Condor
+Description: distributed workload management system - development files
  Like other full-featured batch systems, Condor provides a job queueing
  mechanism, scheduling policy, priority scheme, resource monitoring, and
- resource management. Users submit their serial or parallel jobs to Condor,
+ resource management. Users submit their serial or parallel jobs to Condor;
  Condor places them into a queue. It chooses when and where to run the jobs
  based upon a policy, carefully monitors their progress, and ultimately
  informs the user upon completion.
  .
- Unlike more traditional batch queueing system, Condor can also effectively
+ Unlike more traditional batch queueing systems, Condor can also effectively
  harness wasted CPU power from otherwise idle desktop workstations. Condor
  does not require a shared file system across machines - if no shared file
  system is available, Condor can transfer the job's data files on behalf of
@@ -91,15 +90,15 @@
 Section: doc
 Architecture: all
 Depends: ${misc:Depends}
-Description: documentation for Condor
+Description: distributed workload management system - documentation
  Like other full-featured batch systems, Condor provides a job queueing
  mechanism, scheduling policy, priority scheme, resource monitoring, and
- resource management. Users submit their serial or parallel jobs to Condor,
+ resource management. Users submit their serial or parallel jobs to Condor;
  Condor places them into a queue. It chooses when and where to run the jobs
  based upon a policy, carefully monitors their progress, and ultimately
  informs the user upon completion.
  .
- Unlike more traditional batch queueing system, Condor can also effectively
+ Unlike more traditional batch queueing systems, Condor can also effectively
  harness wasted CPU power from otherwise idle desktop workstations. Condor
  does not require a shared file system across machines - if no shared file
  system is available, Condor can transfer the job's data files on behalf of
@@ -113,15 +112,15 @@
 Section: debug
 Architecture: any
 Depends: ${misc:Depends}, condor (= ${binary:Version})
-Description: debugging symbols for Condor
+Description: distributed workload management system - debugging symbols
  Like other full-featured batch systems, Condor provides a job queueing
  mechanism, scheduling policy, priority scheme, resource monitoring, and
- resource management. Users submit their serial or parallel jobs to Condor,
+ resource management. Users submit their serial or parallel jobs to Condor;
  Condor places them into a queue. It chooses when and where to run the jobs
  based upon a policy, carefully monitors their progress, and ultimately
  informs the user upon completion.
  .
- Unlike more traditional batch queueing system, Condor can also effectively
+ Unlike more traditional batch queueing systems, Condor can also effectively
  harness wasted CPU power from otherwise idle desktop workstations. Condor
  does not require a shared file system across machines - if no shared file
  system is available, Condor can transfer the job's data files on behalf of
@@ -136,15 +135,12 @@
 Section: libdevel
 Architecture: any
 Depends: libclassad3 (= ${binary:Version}), ${misc:Depends}
-Description: library for Condor's classads expression language (development)
- A classad (classified ad) is a mapping from attribute names to expressions. In
- the simplest cases, the expressions are simple constants (integer, floating
- point, or string), thus a form of property list. Attribute expressions
- can also be more complicated. There is a protocol for evaluating an attribute
- expression of a classad vis a vis another ad. Two classads match if each ad has
- attribute requirements that evaluate to true in the context of the other ad.
- Classad  matching is used by the Condor central manager to determine the
- compatibility of jobs and workstations where they may be run.
+Description: Condor classads expression language - development library
+ Classified Advertisements (classads) are the lingua franca of Condor, used for
+ describing jobs, workstations, and other resources. There is a protocol for
+ evaluating whether two classads match, which is is used by the Condor central
+ manager to determine the compatibility of jobs, and workstations where they
+ may be run.
  .
  This package provides the static library and header files.
 
@@ -152,15 +148,12 @@
 Package: libclassad3
 Architecture: any
 Depends: ${shlibs:Depends}, ${misc:Depends}
-Description: library for Condor's classads expression language
- A classad (classified ad) is a mapping from attribute names to expressions. In
- the simplest cases, the expressions are simple constants (integer, floating
- point, or string), thus a form of property list. Attribute expressions
- can also be more complicated. There is a protocol for evaluating an attribute
- expression of a classad vis a vis another ad. Two classads match if each ad has
- attribute requirements that evaluate to true in the context of the other ad.
- Classad  matching is used by the Condor central manager to determine the
- compatibility of jobs and workstations where they may be run.
+Description: Condor classads expression language - runtime library
+ Classified Advertisements (classads) are the lingua franca of Condor, used for
+ describing jobs, workstations, and other resources. There is a protocol for
+ evaluating whether two classads match, which is is used by the Condor central
+ manager to determine the compatibility of jobs, and workstations where they
+ may be run.
  .
  This package provides the runtime library.
 

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