[Date Prev][Date Next] [Thread Prev][Thread Next] [Date Index] [Thread Index]

Re: [RFR] templates://ipplan/{templates}



Christian Perrier wrote:
> Your review should be sent as an answer to this mail.
  
The package description's rather blurbish; better material here:
http://iptrack.sourceforge.net/documentation/README.html

>  Description: web based IP address management software and tracking tool

Surely there's no need for a package synopsis to say that the
contents are software.  Maybe:

   Description: web based IP address manager and tracker

> - This tool goes beyond TCP IP address management including DNS administration,
> + IPplan goes beyond TCP IP address management including DNS administration,

There's no such thing as a TCP IP address, and the "goes beyond foo
including bar" doesn't quite work - does it go beyond bar?  Besides,
it should establish the context first: 

    IPplan is an administrative tool for ISPs and network service companies.
    It goes beyond IP address management to provide DNS administration, [...]

>   configuration file management, circuit management (customizable via templates)
>   and storing of hardware information (customizable via templates). [...]

"Circuit management" is one of those terms I can find adverts for
but no definitions; we're assuming it makes sense in context.

The README implies that *everything* is templatable, so no need for
the repetition:

    configuration file management, circuit management, and storing of hardware
    information, all customizable via templates.

>   IPplan can
>   handle a single network or cater for multiple networks and customers with
>   overlapping address space.

This sudden reference to customers is another reason for starting
with a mention of companies.

>   Makes managing ip addresses and managing ip address
>   space simple and easy!

Very blurby, but I think it works better as:

    Makes managing IP addresses and address spaces simple and easy!
-- 
JBR	with qualifications in linguistics, experience as a Debian
	sysadmin, and probably no clue about this particular package
--- ../ipplan.old/debian/templates	2007-11-16 07:52:50.000000000 +0000
+++ debian/templates	2007-11-22 12:45:31.000000000 +0000
@@ -1,17 +1,16 @@
 Template: ipplan/webserver_type
 Type: multiselect
-_Choices: apache, apache-ssl, apache-perl, apache2
+__Choices: apache, apache-ssl, apache-perl, apache2
 Default: apache, apache-ssl, apache-perl, apache2
-_Description: Automatical web server reconfiguration:
- If you do not select a web server to reconfigure automatically, ipplan
- will not be usable until you reconfigure your webserver to enable
- ipplan.
+_Description: Web server to reconfigure automatically:
+ Please choose the web server that should be automatically configured
+ to run ipplan.
 
 Template: ipplan/restart-webserver
 Type: boolean
 Default: false
 _Description: Should ${webserver} be restarted?
- Remember that in order to activate the new configuration, ${webserver} has
+ In order to activate the new configuration, ${webserver} has
  to be restarted. You can also restart ${webserver} by manually executing
  'invoke-rc.d ${webserver} restart'.
 
@@ -19,52 +18,51 @@
 Type: boolean
 Default: true
 _Description: Configure MySQL?
- Please confirm whether ipplan should attempt to configure MySQL automatically.
+ Please confirm whether MySQL should be configured automatically.
+ .
  If you do not choose this option, please see the instructions in
  /usr/share/doc/ipplan/README.Debian.
- Ipplan could attempt to configure MySQL automatically. If you don't want, see
- the instructions in /usr/share/doc/ipplan/README.Debian. Do not choose this
- option if mysql-server is being installed along with ipplan. Read the file
- /usr/share/doc/mysql-serv/README.Debian to enable networking. It may be
- wise to set a new MySQL root password when installing mysql-server.
 
 Template: ipplan/mysql/dbserver
 Type: string
 Default: localhost
-_Description: MySQL Host:
- The name or IP of the host running MySQL that will store the ipplan
- database.
+_Description: MySQL host:
+ Please enter the name or IP address of the MySQL database server
+ that will store the ipplan database.
 
 Template: ipplan/mysql/dbadmin
 Type: string
 Default: root
-_Description: Database admin user who can create a database:
- Database admin user account capable of creating new databases.
+_Description: Database server administrator username:
+ Please enter the username of the database server administrator. This
+ account must have database creation privileges.
 
 Template: ipplan/purge
 Type: boolean
 Default: true
 _Description: Delete database on purge?
- Please choose whether the database should be removed when ipplan is purged.
+ Please choose whether the database should be removed when the ipplan
+ package is purged.
 
 Template: ipplan/mysql/dbname
 Type: string
 Default: ipplan
-_Description: ipplan database name:
- Name of the ipplan database.
+_Description: IPplan database name:
+ Please enter the name of the database that will host data for IPplan.
 
 Template: ipplan/mysql/dbadmpass
 Type: password
-_Description: Database admin password:
- Password for the database admin user account.
+_Description: Database server administrator password:
 
 Template: ipplan/mysql/dbuser
 Type: string
 Default: ipplan
-_Description: Database user who should access the ipplan database:
- Database user who should access the ipplan database.
+_Description: Database user for IPplan:
+ Please choose the MySQL account that will be used to access the
+ database hosting IPplan data.
 
 Template: ipplan/mysql/dbpass
 Type: password
-_Description: Database password:
- Password for the database user account.
+_Description: Database user password:
+ Please choose the password for the account that will be used to
+ access the database hosting IPplan data.
--- ../ipplan.old/debian/control	2007-11-16 07:52:50.000000000 +0000
+++ debian/control	2007-11-22 12:52:00.000000000 +0000
@@ -4,18 +4,17 @@
 Maintainer: Jan Wagner <waja@cyconet.org>
 Build-Depends: debhelper (>= 5), dpatch, gawk
 Standards-Version: 3.7.2
+Homepage: http://iptrack.sourceforge.net/
 
 Package: ipplan
 Architecture: all
 Depends: apache2 | httpd, php5 | php5-cgi | libapache2-mod-php5 | libapache-mod-php5 | php4 | php4-cgi | libapache2-mod-php4 | libapache-mod-php4, debconf (>= 0.2.26) | debconf-2.0, mysql-client | postgresql-client, wwwconfig-common, php5-mysql | php4-mysql | php5-pgsql | php4-pgsql, libphp-adodb, libphp-phplayersmenu, libphp-phpmailer
 Recommends: mysql-server, postgresql, php5-snmp | php4-snmp
 Suggests: nmap
-Description: web based IP address management software and tracking tool
- This tool goes beyond TCP IP address management including DNS administration,
- configuration file management, circuit management (customizable via templates)
- and storing of hardware information (customizable via templates). IPplan can
- handle a single network or cater for multiple networks and customers with
- overlapping address space. Makes managing ip addresses and managing ip address
- space simple and easy!
- .
-  Homepage: <http://iptrack.sourceforge.net/>
+Description: web based IP address manager and tracker
+ IPplan is an administrative tool for ISPs and network service companies.
+ It goes beyond IP address management to provide DNS administration,
+ configuration file management, circuit management and storing of hardware
+ information, all customizable via templates. IPplan can handle a single
+ network or cater for multiple networks and customers with overlapping address
+ space. Makes managing IP addresses and address spaces simple and easy!
Template: ipplan/webserver_type
Type: multiselect
__Choices: apache, apache-ssl, apache-perl, apache2
Default: apache, apache-ssl, apache-perl, apache2
_Description: Web server to reconfigure automatically:
 Please choose the web server that should be automatically configured
 to run ipplan.

Template: ipplan/restart-webserver
Type: boolean
Default: false
_Description: Should ${webserver} be restarted?
 In order to activate the new configuration, ${webserver} has
 to be restarted. You can also restart ${webserver} by manually executing
 'invoke-rc.d ${webserver} restart'.

Template: ipplan/mysql/configure
Type: boolean
Default: true
_Description: Configure MySQL?
 Please confirm whether MySQL should be configured automatically.
 .
 If you do not choose this option, please see the instructions in
 /usr/share/doc/ipplan/README.Debian.

Template: ipplan/mysql/dbserver
Type: string
Default: localhost
_Description: MySQL host:
 Please enter the name or IP address of the MySQL database server
 that will store the ipplan database.

Template: ipplan/mysql/dbadmin
Type: string
Default: root
_Description: Database server administrator username:
 Please enter the username of the database server administrator. This
 account must have database creation privileges.

Template: ipplan/purge
Type: boolean
Default: true
_Description: Delete database on purge?
 Please choose whether the database should be removed when the ipplan
 package is purged.

Template: ipplan/mysql/dbname
Type: string
Default: ipplan
_Description: IPplan database name:
 Please enter the name of the database that will host data for IPplan.

Template: ipplan/mysql/dbadmpass
Type: password
_Description: Database server administrator password:

Template: ipplan/mysql/dbuser
Type: string
Default: ipplan
_Description: Database user for IPplan:
 Please choose the MySQL account that will be used to access the
 database hosting IPplan data.

Template: ipplan/mysql/dbpass
Type: password
_Description: Database user password:
 Please choose the password for the account that will be used to
 access the database hosting IPplan data.
Source: ipplan
Section: web
Priority: optional
Maintainer: Jan Wagner <waja@cyconet.org>
Build-Depends: debhelper (>= 5), dpatch, gawk
Standards-Version: 3.7.2
Homepage: http://iptrack.sourceforge.net/

Package: ipplan
Architecture: all
Depends: apache2 | httpd, php5 | php5-cgi | libapache2-mod-php5 | libapache-mod-php5 | php4 | php4-cgi | libapache2-mod-php4 | libapache-mod-php4, debconf (>= 0.2.26) | debconf-2.0, mysql-client | postgresql-client, wwwconfig-common, php5-mysql | php4-mysql | php5-pgsql | php4-pgsql, libphp-adodb, libphp-phplayersmenu, libphp-phpmailer
Recommends: mysql-server, postgresql, php5-snmp | php4-snmp
Suggests: nmap
Description: web based IP address manager and tracker
 IPplan is an administrative tool for ISPs and network service companies.
 It goes beyond IP address management to provide DNS administration,
 configuration file management, circuit management and storing of hardware
 information, all customizable via templates. IPplan can handle a single
 network or cater for multiple networks and customers with overlapping address
 space. Makes managing IP addresses and address spaces simple and easy!

Reply to: