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[Debconf-team] Flyer and brochure suggested edits



Hi,

I've had a look at the flyer and brochure.  I have some suggestions.  I've editted the respective *.en.tex files to incorporate my suggestions then diff'd the original *.en.tex files against my modified versions.  I've attached the resulting diff output to this email.

One change I didn't make that I think we need to address is the use of "swag bags" and "conference bags" in the sponsorship benefits table.  We need to pick one term and use it in both places, IMO.

Another inconsistency that I noticed which also needs fixing is the use of both "t-shirts" and "T-shirts" in the two docs.  We need to decide which form to use and then use it throughout.  I didn't have time to address this.

I'm a noob to this conference planning gig and to contributing to Debian in general. Please feel free to comment on my suggestions.

--
znoteer
znoteer@mailbox.org
--- brochure.en.tex	2017-09-26 22:16:30.666530802 -0400
+++ brochure.en.znoteer.tex	2017-09-27 17:19:01.594759142 -0400
@@ -242,7 +242,7 @@
 \onehalfspacing
 \Large
 
-DebConf18 will take place in Hsinchu Taiwan in late July 2018. We anticipate 600
+DebConf18 will take place in Hsinchu Taiwan in late July and early August 2018. We anticipate 600
 attendees and major advances for Debian and for Free Software in general.
 
 We invite you to join us and support this event!
@@ -259,7 +259,7 @@
 Thank you for your interest in DebConf, the annual conference of the Debian
 Project!
 
-This brochure should give you an overview of the sponsorship opportunities for
+This brochure provides an overview of the sponsorship opportunities for
 our conference.  It also introduces the Debian Project, and elaborates on the
 role of the annual conference within the project.
 
@@ -298,7 +298,7 @@
 
 \section{Debian}
 
-\subsection{The Free Operating System}
+\subsection{The Universal Operating System}
 
 Debian is an operating system consisting entirely of Free and Open Source
 Software. The Debian project is dedicated to remaining 100\% free and to being
@@ -306,7 +306,7 @@
 \textbf{Our priorities are Free Software} and \textbf{our users}.
 Our strict set of guidelines serves as an example for many other projects.
 
-\subsection{Debian is Universal, Debian is Choice}
+\subsection{Debian is Freedom. Debian is Choice}
 
 Debian is known for its adherence to the Unix and Free Software philosophies,
 and for its extensiveness — the current release includes \textbf{over 51,000
@@ -347,8 +347,8 @@
 developed operating systems build on Debian}, including the widely popular
 Ubuntu and Linux Mint distributions, LiMuX, and Knoppix. More specialized
 derivatives range from grml (optimized for system administrators) to Tails
-(optimized for privacy). Debian runs in hundreds of schools and, thanks to
-SkoleLinux, powers gaming platforms with SteamOS. Debian OS has been deployed by
+(optimized for privacy). Debian runs in hundreds of schools thanks to
+SkoleLinux, and powers gaming platforms with SteamOS. Debian OS has been deployed by
 public institutions such as the cities of Munich and Vienna, and the German
 Federal Office for Information Security (BSI).
 
@@ -406,7 +406,7 @@
 \subsection{Live World-wide Video Streaming}
 
 A dedicated team of volunteers with years of experience with video coverage will
-record all sessions at DebConf, to be streamed live via the Internet. This
+record all previously scheduled sessions at DebConf, to be streamed live via the Internet. This
 allows for \textbf{remote participation by those who are not able to attend.}
 
 % FIXME: Add url to previous year's videos?
@@ -442,7 +442,7 @@
   as an annual event, showcases that community and enables it to
   flourish}. DebConf16 was no exception. I encourage anyone who wants to
   examine first-hand a good model of a functioning Free Software
-  community attend DebConf.
+  community to attend DebConf.
 }{Bradley M. Kuhn, Software Freedom Conservancy}
 %\ Asked Bradley's permission on August 20th 2016, received it on August 23rd 2016
 
@@ -457,7 +457,7 @@
 
   I have to say networking was the highlight of DebConf for me. \textbf{Before
   attending, I had only been in contact with 3 people that were at the
-  conference, and those 3 had been virtual contacts}, I didn’t really know
+  conference, and those 3 had been virtual contacts}, I didn't really know
   them. [\ldots] I got to meet lots of people that way, met some Debian
   contributors from my home country (Brazil), some from my current city (NYC),
   and yet others that had similar interests as I do who I might work with in the
@@ -510,7 +510,7 @@
     & $\surd$ & $\surd$ & $\surd$ & $\surd$ & $\surd$ \\
     Access to swag bags
     & & $\surd$ & $\surd$ & $\surd$ & $\surd$ \\
-    Logo on t-shirt and conference bag &
+    Logo on t-shirts and conference bags &
     & & $\surd$ & $\surd$ & $\surd$ \\
     Presence at job fair &
     & & $\surd$ & $\surd$ & $\surd$ \\
@@ -526,7 +526,7 @@
 
 \begin{center}
 \includegraphics[width=\linewidth]{img/debconf-shirt.jpg}
-\footnotesize \emph{Participants with T-Shirts from all past DebConfs}
+\footnotesize \emph{Participants with T-Shirts from past DebConfs}
 \end{center}
 
 \subsection{Job Postings and Job Fair}
@@ -544,7 +544,7 @@
 
 Sponsors that participated in the job fair in previous years have said that this
 was a unique opportunity to engage with the community, some of them filling open
-positions with engineers who's skills and knowledge were difficult to find
+positions with engineers whose skills and knowledge were difficult to find
 elsewhere.
 
 We invite all our sponsors to post job offerings to our job wall.
@@ -661,7 +661,7 @@
 Taiwan, Japan, South Korea and Mainland China. As always, many of our
 contributors will come from further afield. We expect there are attendees who
 will require travel and/or accommodation assistance to attend this official
-meeting of the project. Our sponsors enable us to help as many as possible, and
+meeting of the project. Our sponsors enable us to help as many attendees as possible, and
 bring the community together for DebConf.
 
 All funds raised for DebConf will be used towards this goal. Any surplus after
@@ -720,7 +720,7 @@
   \item NCTU Bamboo Lake, Public Domain
   \item Photo of Karen Sandler by Michael Banck, CC-BY 4.0
   \item DebConf18 local team by Aigars Mahinovs, CC-BY 2.0+ or GPL-2+
-  \item DebConf T-shirt by Aigars Mahinovs, CC-BY 2.0+ or GPL-2+
+  \item DebConf T-shirts by Aigars Mahinovs, CC-BY 2.0+ or GPL-2+
   \item DebConf17 group photo by Aigars Mahinovs, CC-BY 2.0+ or GPL-2+
 \end{compactitem}
 
--- flyer.en.tex	2017-09-27 21:13:24.226873481 -0400
+++ flyer.en.znoteer.tex	2017-09-27 21:26:54.888488505 -0400
@@ -189,8 +189,8 @@
     Logo on sponsor webpage
     & $\surd$ & $\surd$ & $\surd$ & $\surd$ & $\surd$ \\
     Access to swag bags
-    & & & $\surd$ & $\surd$ & $\surd$ \\
-    Logo on t-shirt and conference bag &
+    & & $\surd$ & $\surd$ & $\surd$ & $\surd$ \\
+    Logo on t-shirts and conference bags &
     & & $\surd$ & $\surd$ & $\surd$ \\
     Presence at job fair &
     & & $\surd$ & $\surd$ & $\surd$ \\

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