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Bug#509371: installation-guide: Installation guide accessibility sections



On Monday 06 April 2009, Samuel Thibault wrote:
> > (I don't do this that often either; grep in existing docs is your
> > friend.)
>
> Yes, it doesn't work very well in the installation guide, but it does
> in the release notes indeed.

Well, it works for me even for the manual :-)

> Here is an updated patch.

I've reviewed the patch and below a diff with some suggested changes.
Please check them and let me know if you're OK with them. A few are to
avoid unnecessary branding. A few are because the architecture list for
the manual is slightly different from the "normal" architecture list.
Some are for general consistency.

After you are OK I'll merge these changes, do some needed whitespace
cleanups and commit the patch.

Cheers,
FJP

diff --git a/manual/en/boot-installer/accessibility.xml b/manual/en/boot-installer/accessibility.xml
index f94d699..1de274f 100644
--- a/manual/en/boot-installer/accessibility.xml
+++ b/manual/en/boot-installer/accessibility.xml
@@ -4,10 +4,10 @@
  <sect1 id="boot-installer-accessibility" arch="not-s390"><title>Accessibility</title>
 <para>
 
-Some users may need particular support because of e.g. some visual
+Some users may need specific support because of e.g. some visual
 impairment. <phrase arch="alpha;ia64;powerpc;x86">USB braille
-displays are automatically detected, but most other</phrase> <phrase
-arch="arm;armel;hppa;mips;impsel;sparc;s390"> Most</phrase> accessibility
+displays are detected automatically, but most other</phrase> <phrase
+arch="arm;hppa;mips;mipsel;m68k;sparc">Most</phrase> accessibility
 features have to be enabled manually. <phrase arch="x86">On machines
 that support it, the boot menu emits a beep when it is ready to receive
 keystrokes.</phrase> Some boot parameters can <phrase arch="x86">then</phrase>
@@ -34,16 +34,16 @@ you can choose a braille table by entering the preference menu.
 <para>
 
 Serial braille displays cannot safely be automatically detected
-(since that may brick some of them).  You thus need to append the
+(since that may damage some of them).  You thus need to append the
 
<userinput>brltty=<replaceable>driver</replaceable>,<replaceable>port</replaceable>,<replaceable>table</replaceable></userinput>
 boot parameter to tell <classname>brltty</classname> which driver it should use.
-<userinput>driver</userinput> should be replaced by the two-letter driver code
-for your terminal, see in the <ulink url="&url-brltty-driver-codes;">driver code
-list</ulink>. <userinput>device</userinput> should be replaced by the name of
+<replaceable>driver</replaceable> should be replaced by the two-letter driver code
+for your terminal (see the <ulink url="&url-brltty-driver-codes;">driver code
+list</ulink>). <replaceable>device</replaceable> should be replaced by the name of
 the serial port the display is connected to, <userinput>ttyS0</userinput> is
-the default. <userinput>table</userinput> is the name of the braille table to
-be used, see the <ulink url="&url-brltty-table-codes;">table code list</ulink>,
-the english table is the default.  Note that the table can be changed later by
+the default. <replaceable>table</replaceable> is the name of the braille table to
+be used (see the <ulink url="&url-brltty-table-codes;">table code list</ulink>);
+the English table is the default.  Note that the table can be changed later by
 entering the preference menu.
 
 </para>
@@ -54,17 +54,17 @@ entering the preference menu.
 
 <para>
 
-Support for hardware speech synthesis devices is enabled only along support for
-graphical installer.  You thus need to select the <computeroutput>Graphical
-install</computeroutput> entry in the boot menu.
+Support for hardware speech synthesis devices is available only alongside support for
+graphical installer.  You thus need to select the <quote>Graphical
+install</quote> entry in the boot menu.
 
 Hardware speech synthesis devices cannot be
 automatically detected.  You thus need to append the
 <userinput>speakup.synth=<replaceable>driver</replaceable></userinput> boot
 parameter to tell <classname>speakup</classname> which driver it should use.
-<userinput>driver</userinput> should be replaced by the driver code for
-your device, see the <ulink url="&url-speakup-driver-codes;">driver code
-list</ulink>.  The textual version of the installer will then be automatically
+<replaceable>driver</replaceable> should be replaced by the driver code for
+your device (see <ulink url="&url-speakup-driver-codes;">driver code
+list</ulink>).  The textual version of the installer will then be automatically
 selected, and support for the speech synthesis device will be automatically
 installed on the target system.
 
diff --git a/manual/en/hardware/accessibility.xml b/manual/en/hardware/accessibility.xml
index d080961..15666cb 100644
--- a/manual/en/hardware/accessibility.xml
+++ b/manual/en/hardware/accessibility.xml
@@ -5,27 +5,27 @@
  <title>Braille Displays</title>
 <para>
 
-Debian's support for braille displays is determined by the underlying
+Support for braille displays is determined by the underlying
 support found in <classname>brltty</classname>. Most displays
-work under <classname>brltty</classname>, via serial, USB or
+work under <classname>brltty</classname>, connected via either a serial port, USB or
 bluetooth. Details on supported braille devices can be found on the <ulink
-url="&url-brltty;"><classname>brltty</classname> website</ulink>. Debian
+url="&url-brltty;"><classname>brltty</classname> website</ulink>. &debian;
 &release; ships with <classname>brltty</classname> version &brlttyver;.
 
 </para>
  </sect2>
 
  <sect2 id="hardware-speech-synthesis" arch="x86">
- <title>Hardware Speech Syntheses</title>
+ <title>Hardware Speech Synthesis</title>
 <para>
 
-Debian's support for hardware speech synthesis devices is determined
+Support for hardware speech synthesis devices is determined
 by the underlying support found in <classname>speakup</classname>.
 <classname>speakup</classname> only supports integrated boards and external
 devices connected to a serial port (no USB or serial-to-USB adapters are
 supported).  Details on supported hardware speech synthesis devices can
 be found on the <ulink url="&url-speakup;"><classname>speakup</classname>
-website</ulink>. Debian &release; ships with <classname>speakup</classname>
+website</ulink>. &debian; &release; ships with <classname>speakup</classname>
 version &speakupver;.
 
 </para>



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